资源简介 (共25张PPT)读后续写讲评The Christmas WitchEvery kid in my neighborhood knew about the Christmas Witch. She was an elderly woman who left her Christmas decorations up all year long: a twinkling tree in the living room, a plastic wreath(花环)on the front door, and...I was told the decorations were meant to get kids closer to the house so the Christmas Witch could take them. I promised myself I would never go near that place. But when I turned fourteen, I got a newspaper route and discovered I'd have to deliver papers to the Christmas Witch. But my mother just advised me not to worry.My first day of delivery was a dark, freezing March morning. The sky was just turning pink as I approached the last house on my route… that of the Christmas Witch. I tiptoed up the porch steps and placed the newspaper by the door. Then I quickly turned around. And just then I slipped, and fell down the stairs. I sprained my ankle, unable to walk.The light was on. The door opened. Someone came out. It was the Christmas Witch."Dear me," said she."Are you all right " Speechless, I pointed at my ankle."Come in; make sure you' re okay." She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, but a nice smile, like she was concerned. I had no choice. Holding her hand, I got into her house and was placed in a chair."Relax." She hurried into the kitchen and returned a moment later, handing me a cup of hot tea. “I call your parents.” she said.试题呈现The Christmas WitchI told her my mother's number as she dialed. She got through, told my mother everything and turned, “Your mother will be here shortly.” “Thank you, Mrs. Wright.” “You' re welcome.” She sat down across from me, smiling. “You don't have to call me Mrs. Wright; you can call me Christmas Witch.”I was a bit embarrassed. “It's alright.” She smiled. “I hear what people say. It doesn't matter.” “You do have lots of decorations,” I said. “I think it's pretty,” she replied. I said, “People think it's…weird.” “They don’t understand why I leave up my decorations,” she responded.Like most teenagers,I just blurted out the next question. “Why?”Paragraph 1:“It was because of my son, Anthony, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright.__________Paragraph 2:The doorbell rang and my mother arrived.______________________________________试题呈现the Christmas WitchRead for basic informationI, the fourteen-year-old boy who delivered papersMy motherAnthony, who died in the warwhenwherea dark, freezing March morningthe last house on my route ----at the Christmas Witch’s houseEvery kid in my neighborhood knew about the Christmas Witch. She was an elderly woman who left her Christmas decorations up all year long: a twinkling tree in the living room, a plastic wreath(花环)on the front door, and...I was told the decorations were meant to get kids closer to the house so the Christmas Witch could take them. I promised myself I would never go near that place. But when I turned fourteen, I got a newspaper route and discovered I'd have to deliver papers to the Christmas Witch. But my mother just advised me not to worry.My first day of delivery was a dark, freezing March morning. The sky was just turning pink as I approached the last house on my route… that of the Christmas Witch. I tiptoed up the porch steps and placed the newspaper by the door. Then I quickly turned around. And just then I slipped, and fell down the stairs. I sprained my ankle, unable to walk.The light was on. The door opened. Someone came out. It was the Christmas Witch."Dear me," said she."Are you all right " Speechless, I pointed at my ankle."Come in; make sure you' re okay." She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, but a nice smile, like she was concerned. I had no choice. Holding her hand, I got into her house and was placed in a chair."Relax." She hurried into the kitchen and returned a moment later, handing me a cup of hot tea. “I call your parents.” she said.I told her my mother's number as she dialed. She got through, told my mother everything and turned, “Your mother will be here shortly.” “Thank you, Mrs. Wright.” “You' re welcome.” She sat down across from me, smiling. “You don't have to call me Mrs. Wright; you can call me Christmas Witch.”I was a bit embarrassed. “It's alright.” She smiled. “I hear what people say. It doesn't matter.” “You do have lots of decorations,” I said. “I think it's pretty,” she replied. I said, “People think it's…weird.” “They don’t understand why I leave up my decorations,” she responded.Like most teenagers,I just blurted out the next question. “Why?”Read for structure12345678Para. 1-2 Background informationPara. 3-8 The development of the storyThe light was on. The door opened. Someone came out. It was the Christmas Witch.Before meeting the CWAfter meeting the CWEvery kid in my neighborhood knew about the Christmas Witch. She was an elderly woman who left her Christmas decorations up all year long: a twinkling tree in the living room, a plastic wreath(花环)on the front door, and...I was told the decorations were meant to get kids closer to the house so the Christmas Witch could take them. I promised myself I would never go near that place. But when I turned fourteen, I got a newspaper route and discovered I'd have to deliver papers to the Christmas Witch. But my mother just advised me not to worry.Read for detailed informationWhat’s my attitude to her Every kid in my neighborhood knew about the Christmas Witch. She was an elderly woman who left her Christmas decorations up all year long: a twinkling tree in the living room, a plastic wreath(花环)on the front door, and...I was told the decorations were meant to get kids closer to the house so the Christmas Witch could take them. I promised myself I would never go near that place. But when I turned fourteen, I got a newspaper route and discovered I'd have to deliver papers to the Christmas Witch. But my mother just advised me not to worry.Who was the Christmas Witch Every kid in my neighborhood knew about the Christmas Witch. She was an elderly woman who left her Christmas decorations up all year long: a twinkling tree in the living room, a plastic wreath(花环)on the front door, and...I was told the decorations were meant to get kids closer to the house so the Christmas Witch could take them. I promised myself I would never go near that place. But when I turned fourteen, I got a newspaper route and discovered I'd have to deliver papers to the Christmas Witch. But my mother just advised me not to worry.I promised never to go near the house of the Christmas Witch but I had to because it's right on my route.My first day of delivery was a dark, freezing March morning. The sky was just turning pink as I approached the last house on my route… that of the Christmas Witch. I tiptoed up the porch steps and placed the newspaper by the door. Then I quickly turned around. And just then I slipped, and fell down the stairs. I sprained my ankle, unable to walk.Read for detailed informationMy first day of delivery was a dark, freezing March morning.My first day of delivery was a dark, freezing March morning. The sky was just turning pink as I approached the last house on my route… that of the Christmas Witch. I tiptoed up the porch steps and placed the newspaper by the door. Then I quickly turned around. And just then I slipped, and fell down the stairs. I sprained my ankle, unable to walk.以景烘情What can you infer from the verbs “tiptoed up” “quickly turned around” The author wanted to flee the house quickly;The author didn’t want to meet the CW.动作描写What can we infer from it about the author's feeling unreluctant/ upset...The light was on. The door opened. Someone came out. It was the Christmas Witch."Dear me," said she."Are you all right " Speechless, I pointed at my ankle."Come in; make sure you' re okay." She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, but a nice smile, like she was concerned. I had no choice. Holding her hand, I got into her house and was placed in a chair."Relax." She hurried into the kitchen and returned a moment later, handing me a cup of hot tea. “I call your parents.” she said.I told her my mother's number as she dialed. She got through, told my mother everything and turned, “Your mother will be here shortly.” “Thank you, Mrs. Wright.” “You' re welcome.” She sat down across from me, smiling. “You don't have to call me Mrs. Wright; you can call me Christmas Witch.”I was a bit embarrassed. “It's alright.” She smiled. “I hear what people say. It doesn't matter.” “You do have lots of decorations,” I said. “I think it's pretty,” she replied. I said, “People think it's…weird.” “They don’t understand why I leave up my decorations,” she responded.Like most teenagers, I just blurted out the next question. “Why ”Read for detailed informationWhat kind of person was the Christmas Witch The light was on. The door opened. Someone came out. It was the Christmas Witch."Dear me," said she."Are you all right " Speechless, I pointed at my ankle."Come in; make sure you' re okay." She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, but a nice smile, like she was concerned. I had no choice. Holding her hand, I got into her house and was placed in a chair."Relax." She hurried into the kitchen and returned a moment later, handing me a cup of hot tea. “I call your parents.” she said.I told her my mother's number as she dialed. She got through, told my mother everything and turned, “Your mother will be here shortly.” “Thank you, Mrs. Wright.” “You' re welcome.” She sat down across from me, smiling. “You don't have to call me Mrs. Wright; you can call me Christmas Witch.”I was a bit embarrassed. “It's alright.” She smiled. “I hear what people say. It doesn't matter.” “You do have lots of decorations,” I said. “I think it's pretty,” she replied. I said, “People think it's…weird.” “They don’t understand why I leave up my decorations,” she responded.Like most teenagers, I just blurted out the next question. “Why ”She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, but a nice smile, like she was concerned.She hurried into the kitchen andreturned a moment later, handing me a cup of hot tea.She got through, told my mother everything and turned,She sat down across fromme, smiling.She smiled.语言描写表情+动作Previous impressions before meeting the CW Impressions after meeting the CWweirdevilconsideratekind-heartedapproachableThe author was told thedecrations up all yearlong to attract thechildren getting closerto the house and thentook them.She smiled, not a wicked-witch smile, like she was concerned.She hurried into the kitchen andreturned a moment later, handing mea cup of hot tea.She sat down across from me, smiling.+ 语言描写What can we learn from the author’s experience I knew about her as the Christmas witch.I had to deliver papers to her house.I fell down the stairs and sprained my ankle, unable to walk when delivering papers to her home.I got into her house and was placed in a chair.I blurted out the next question. “Why ”Read for the plot and emotionnever to go near her housefrightened/ scaredBackground/BeginningRising ActionClimaxunwilling/upsetanxious/worried/uneasyrelaxed/embrassmedcuriousFalling ActionPara1: It was because of my son, Anthony, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright.Story MountainEndingParag2: The doorbell rang and my mother arrived.What’s the real reason for leaving her Christmasdecorations up all year long Paragraph 1The doorbell rang and my mother arrived.Paragraph 2(How and) when did Anthony die How was her son connected with the Christmas decorations Afterwards, what was my reaction to it What did my mother do/say to Mrs. Wright What did I do/say to Mrs. Wright What did I learn from the incident “It was because of my son, Anthony, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright.Predict the plotDesign the plotParagraph11.Anthony was scheduled to come home before Christmas.2.But three days later after the New Year Eve, Anthony was killed in a helicopter crash.When and how did Anthony die How was her son connected with the Christmas decorations 1. My boy called me on New Year's Eve, telling me to leave up the Christmas decorations.2. And even though I knew it didn't change anything, I wouldn't take down those decorations, even after all these years.“It was because of my son, Anthony, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright.Paragraph1Mrs Wright wasn't a witch. She was a sad, isolated motherstruggling with a terrible loss.What did I feel and think Paragraph2What did my mother do/say to Mrs. Wright Design the plot“It was because of my son, Anthony, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright.The doorbell rang and my mother arrived.My mother expressed her heartfelt gratitude to Mrs. Wright and said Goodbye.Accompanied by my mother, I went home.Paragraph2What did I do to Mrs. Wright 1.Since then, whenever I delieved newspapers to Mrs. Wright, she smiled, sayinghow much she enjoyed my visit.2.Funny, I didn't think of her as the Christmas Witch anymore. Instead, I regardedher as a kind-hearted woman like my mom.What did I learn from the incident Design the plotThe doorbell rang and my mother arrived.Be a little less judgmental and a bit moreunderstanding toward others.少一点评判,多一点理解他人Returning home, I promised that I would never judge a person before I knew the truth.主题升华本段重点描写了Anthony去世前的情景:圣诞节装饰房子(与首段呼应)的时候,一个紧急电话而去参加战争,几个月后死了。自此之后,她就没有取下圣诞装饰物。本段首句与所给句衔接自然,告知读者Anthony死于圣诞节。而后对本文作者吃惊后悔的情绪反应进行描写。情节较为合理。Paragraph1学生考场作文及点评:Paragraph 2本段先描写我妈妈向Mrs. Wright表示感谢,然后呼应上文“But my mother just advised me not to worry.”到最后作者打算告知镇上所有人事情的真相。本段第一句与首句衔接稍有欠缺。但是告知母亲事情的真相并打算在接下来的圣诞节给Mrs. Wright一个惊喜这一思路,还是不错的。学生考场作文及点评:“It was because of my son, Anthon, who died in the war,” said Mrs. Wright. “Anthony was scheduled to come home before Christmas. He called me on New Year's Eve, teling me to leave up the Christmas decorations. But three days later, Anthony was killed in a helicopter crash. My boy never made it back home. And even though I know it doesn't change anything, I won't take down those decorations, even after all these years.” Mrs. Wright wasn't a witch. She was a sad, isolated mother struggling with a terrible loss.The doorbell rang and my mother arrived. Accompanied by my mother, I went home. My sprained ankle healed quickly. Since then, whenever I delivered newspapers to Mrs. Wright, she smiled, saying how much she enjoyed my visit. Funny, I didn't think of her as the Christmas Witch anymore. Several years later, Mrs. Wright had passed away. After all these years, that experience has always helped me remember that ageless lesson: Be a little less judgmental and a bit more understanding toward others.参考范文作文点评:1.第一段第一句与所给句衔接自然,且第一段较为合理地回答了为什么常年留着圣诞节装饰物这个问题。但是第二段母亲这个人物在本次续写中应为次要人物,可以简单描述。第二段最后部分的故事升华还是不错的。2.倒装句型的使用So thrilled was I that I ...;3.高级词块的使用如:sign with moistened eyes/be smashed into pieces unmercifully等。学生考场作文及点评:学生考场作文及点评:作文点评:1.第一段对“我”后悔等夹杂的情绪描写很棒。第二段最后部分的故事总结不错,自然而然点到本文的中心话题“从被误会的女巫到充满爱意的妈妈”;2.对于为什么常年留着圣诞装饰物的原因描写稍显欠缺;3.Mingled with mixed feelings作为状语,后面主语应该是I. 所以此句改为:Mingled with mixed feelings, I was at my end of wits, words choking me.后面半句为独立主格结构。作文点评:1.第一段第一句与所给句衔接自然,且第一段较为合理地回答了为什么常年留着圣诞节装饰物这个问题。但是最后一句话与第二段首句的衔接欠佳;2.第二段较好的解决了本文后续作者为Mrs Wright所做了什么且结尾较为自然;3.本篇最大的亮点在于两段人物主角的互动为“我”与“Mrs Wright”,而非次要人物“Mom”。学生考场作文及点评:Tears streamed down her face/cheeks.Tears welled up in her eyes.Two drops of tears rolled/slide down her cheeks.She couldn’t help shedding tears.She couldn’t/fail to contain her tears.She tried to fight back her tears.Her cheeks were wet with tears.Her eyes were flooded with tears.Her eyes began to water.with tears streaming down his face/cheekswith tears welling up in his eyssLanguage accumulation--伤心(落泪)She was overcome with grief.Grief came in waves. 悲伤如潮水一般涌来。A ripple of sadness welled up inside him. 涌起阵阵悲伤My heart seemed to be torn .Language accumulation--- 悲伤、抑郁感到悲伤的细节描述 Upon hearing the bad news, she felt extremely sad. Upon hearing the bad news, she felt her heart ached, tears streamingdown her cheeks. Upon hearing the bad news, she, numb with grief, had trouble speaking. Upon hearing the bad news, she felt seized by a burst of sadness andcouldn’t help crying.Language accumulation--- 孤单I felt abandoned/left out/a strong sense of loss by the world.I ended up feeling completely lost and abandoned.Ever since I lost him, I had been faced with a deep sense of loss ---- a feeling which is difficult for me to describe in words.I was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness and sank into hopelessness.Language accumulation----开心、高兴Her eyes twinkled with pleasure every time she saw me.Her eyes danced with joy and happiness.Smiles were dancing in her eyes.Her eyes brimmed over with warm excited tears.My face flushed/burned with embarrassment.My cheeks burned with shame.My throat was dry and my face was burning up.So ashamed was I that I could feel my face burning/the blood rush to my face.I dropped my eyes.My face flushed radish red and I stared at my feet, hoping no one wouldnotice how embarrassed I was.Guilt and shame flowing in my mind, I didn’t even dare to watch her in theeye, weeping in regret.Language accumulation----羞愧Wish you excellent performancein the Gaokao! 展开更多...... 收起↑ 资源预览