资源简介

(共27张PPT)
【读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+描写占比】
1.第一件事：串联首尾段5W1H+P1P2给定句，定事件走向
（1）读首段得知：人物+大致事件
（2）读尾段得知：具体事件+态度（列出所有角色）
（3）读P1P2给定句得知：故事结局走向
2.第二件事：划出关键词（角色特点、关键情节）
（1）划出角色相关描写（adj/v/n）:用来续写角色，改写关键词
（2）划出矛盾/需求，关键情节：用来续写情节，甚至是“升华”
3.观察各类描写占比，续写比例与其一致
（1）看各类描写：续写时尽量占比一致
（2）语法句式：尽量保持一致，也可模仿好句
（3）占比多的描写：关键所在，决定情节走向
【读后续写：谋篇布局｜如何不离题】
续写主要考查内容、语言表达和篇章结构三方面：
（1）内容：丰富、合理、有逻辑、完整，与原文情境融洽度高。（读懂，贴原文写）
（2）语言：词汇和语法结构多样、恰当，错误很少，不影响理解。（原文基调，词汇句式风格，描写占比，续写一致。）
（3）结构：段落间、句间衔接有效、连贯
（连接词/句首句中隔断词）
【读后续写：谋篇布局｜如何不离题】
划重点.三方面（内容、语言、结构）
1、与原文融洽度高：读懂；贴原文写
2、词汇语法多样：跟原文风格，描写占比，一致
3、连贯：连接词
【读后续写：谋篇布局｜融洽度】
【读后续写：谋篇布局｜融洽度】
续写融洽度
【2021全国1卷】（原文早餐分为French toast吐司和porridge粥）
原文：“They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge.”
习作：“breakfast” “porridge” “pizza”(弱)
范文：As the twins looked around them in disappointment,their father appeared...and Father had made some egg sandwiches and cooked some oat porridge. Then he sneaked back to bed. Meanwhile,the twins prepared the breakfast tray,added a card they had made and walked out of the kitchen.
【读后续写：抓主旨｜如何不离题】
读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+分析描写占比
读原文时，做3件事：
1.首尾段5W1H+P1P2给定句，定故事走向；
2.划出关键词：人物角色特点、关键情节；
3.观察各类描写占比，续写比例与其一致。
【读后续写：抓主旨｜如何不离题】
读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+分析描写占比
1.首尾段：5W1H+P1P2给定句，定故事走向；
首段得知：人物+大致事件
尾段（重要）得知：具体事件+态度
P1P2首句(重要)得知：故事结局走向
串联：who/when/where/why/what/how;
最重要：列出所有角色，可续写不同角色的反应、互动
【1.首尾段：5W1H+P1P2给定句】
“who”:同一时间，各个角色的反应、互动
“what”：延续事件、动作链
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. They hugged her and yelled ‘Happy Mother’s Day,darling Mummy!’ Mother hugged the twins. Her eyes widened at the sight of the breakfast tray. She shook Father who was pretending to snore. He feigned astonishment when he saw the breakfast. Mother bit into a sandwich and said it was the best she had ever tasted. Jeff immediately wanted to have a bite. Jenna caught her father’s eye and they winked at each other secretly.(分开写“twins”的不同反应)
【读后续写：抓主旨｜如何不离题】
读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+分析描写占比
2.划关键词：角色特点（adj/v/n）+关键情节
词：划出角色相关的描写，突出特点，性格决定命运/情节
用来：续写描写的角色，或用其替换词；（融洽，不离题）
句子：矛盾/问题/需求，决定故事走向的关键情节
用来：加入情节设计，解决问题/需求（甚至用于“升华”）
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE 【红字：用来写情节；绿字：用来写心理/修饰动作】
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day. How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed. They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge. They had watched their mother in the kitchen. There was nothing to it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen. They decided to boil the porridge first. They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast. Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk. Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next, Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan. Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds. Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread. This time, she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake. The next minute, the porridge boiled over and put out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly. But the stove was a mess now. Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge. But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cold water. Then she caught the smell of burning. Oh dear! The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
【划关键词：角色特点（adj/v/n）+关键情节】用来：
原文：But the stove was a mess now. clean it up (直接加入情节)
cook the rest of the porridge; bread turned black; toast; porridge(用同义词替换)
excitement; pleased and proud Mother; panicked; calm(延续情绪基调)
范文：As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. One look and he knew what they were up to. Seeing their crestfallen faces, he told them to clean up the kitchen while he helped them make breakfast for Mother. The twins cheered up and did as told. Within an hour, the kitchen was cleaned, and Father had made some egg sandwiches and cooked some oat porridge. Then he sneaked back to bed. Meanwhile,the twins prepared the breakfast tray, adding a card they had made and walk out of the kitchen.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. They hugged her and yelled ‘Happy Mother’s Day,darling Mummy!’ Mother hugged the twins. Her eyes widened at the sight of the breakfast tray. She shook Father who was pretending to snore. He feigned astonishment when he saw the breakfast. Mother bit into a sandwich and said it was the best she had ever tasted. Jeff immediately wanted to have a bite. Jenna caught her father’s eye and they winked at each other secretly.
Gradually, fear came into her heart. What should she do How could she get rid of this terrible man To deal with this situation, she decided to drive quickly to the police station where Sam worked. However, she was even more surprised when she saw the car still followed her and stopped behind her. “How dare he follow me here ” she said to herself. She could feel her heart beating faster than ever. At that time, Sam was standing on duty outside the police station. Seeing Sam wearing a police uniform, she was more than delighted that she would be safe.
At once, she jumped out of her car and ran to Sam without any delay. Pointing at the man inside the car, she said a bad man was following her and asked Sam to arrest him. To find what was happening, Sam walked towards the man who had stopped his car near the woman’s.
But what shocked Sam was that the man didn’t try to escape when he saw him. Instead, the man looked relieved. Seconds later, the man walked towards the woman and Sam.
例
【读后续写：抓主旨｜如何不离题】
读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+分析描写占比
3.观察各类描写占比，续写占比尽量与其一致
（1）各类描写：续写与原文占比一致
（2）语法句式：保持一致，也可模仿好句
（3）占比多的描写：关键所在，决定情节设计
Mama and I spend mornings cleaning up thedirt that blows into our house. Mama says all the dust is due to the drought. The dirt sifts into everything. It covers our clothes. We have to wash the dishes before each meal. We rarely drive thetruck because Papa fears the dust from the road will ruin the motor.
When my sister, Faye, and I walk to school, we wear kerchiefs over our mouths so we don't breathe in the dirt. On days when the air is so bad that they close the school, we stay home and help Mama put wet sheets over the wincdows. But the dirt always finds a way in.
Last Sunday, there was no dirt in the air, only bright spring sunshine and a clear blue sky. After lunch, Papa headed out to the field to check on the cattle while I played with Faye in the yard. The temperature suddenly dropped. I looked to the west and saw a huge black cloud of dust. All the birds flew away.
例
观察各类描写占比：续写尽量保持一致
各类描写：环境/动作/心理
“I must warn Papa,”I thought to myself.To avoid her panicking, I headed off to the field but the storm hit so fast, and in an instant the day turned into night. By the time I entered the cow field the fine sand was whipping across my face. I screamed for Papa, hoping my voice would lead him back.The dirt and sand stung my skin like a thousard bees. Although I was terrified, I refused to turn back. My dad was stranded and needed my lhelp. Covering my face with one hand, I groped my way toward the truck and opened the door.First I tried turning the truck's lights on and off, hoping that Papa would see them flashing, but the sandstorm let no light escape. Then I pushed the horn again and again, so Papa would hear it. I oushed until I had no more strength in my arms. Suddenly, Papa's face appeared at the windovw. My heart leaped with surprise and relief. He opened the door and climbed onto the seat nextto me.He then pulled me into his arms and said, "Oh, Iris, you saved me!" Finally, the wind subsided and the dust began to settle. Dirt was piled up to the window on one side of the truck and halfway up the door on the other. Papa kicked against the door,opening it far enough to let us out. Sand and soil drifts were everywhere, but we were safe.
例
各类描写：环境/动作/心理
Sam is a brave policeman who often comes across dangerous situations. However, when he was young, he experienced a funny story during his work.
That was a nice day, and Sam worked at the police station as usual. A rich and beautiful woman carrying a purse drove to work. She parked her car in the street outside her office. When she finished her work that afternoon, she got into her car quickly and started driving home as usual. Suddenly, she noticed a yellow car at her back, whose driver was a man with a very ugly look. To her surprise, when she turned left, the yellow car also turned left. When she turned right, the yellow car turned right, too. When she stopped at the traffic lights, the yellow car stopped behind her.
例
观察高频语法句式：续写尽量保持一致
Gradually, fear came into her heart. What should she do How could she get rid of this terrible man To deal with this situation, she decided to drive quickly to the police station where Sam worked. However, she was even more surprised when she saw the car still followed her and stopped behind her. “How dare he follow me here ” she said to herself. She could feel her heart beating faster than ever. At that time, Sam was standing on duty outside the police station. Seeing Sam wearing a police uniform, she was more than delighted that she would be safe.
At once, she jumped out of her car and ran to Sam without any delay. Pointing at the man inside the car, she said a bad man was following her and asked Sam to arrest him. To find what was happening, Sam walked towards the man who had stopped his car near the woman’s.
But what shocked Sam was that the man didn’t try to escape when he saw him. Instead, the man looked relieved. Seconds later, the man walked towards the woman and Sam.
例
观察高频语法句式：续写尽量保持一致
从句、非谓语：
...who often comes across dangerous.../...who had stopped his car near...
...whose driver was a man with a very ugly look/...where Sam worked...
To deal with this situation,.../To find what was happening...
Seeing Sam wearing a police uniform.../Pointing at the man inside the car,...
when引导的时间状语从句:
when he was young,.../When she finished her work that afternoon,
...when she turned left,/When she turned right...
When she stopped at the traffic lights.../
...when she saw the car still.../...when he saw him
情绪名词，做主语：...fear came into her heart
内心活动，反问：What should she do /How could she
“How dare he follow me here ”she said to herself.
副词/介词短语，做句首：Suddenly.../To her surprise.../instead.../Seconds later
观察高频语法句式：续写尽量保持一致
The man just smiled and started to tellthe truth. Actually, he intended to return her purse. Surprisingly, the story went ir this way. When the man parked his car, he was attracted by a snap of a purse falling to ground from a lady's bag, whose owner failed to notice it at all. Before hecould managed to remind her, she pulled her car away straightforward. Without delay,he began to chase her. Fortunately, she stopped somehow at last. After recalling what had happened indeed, he asked Sam to check the money in the purse which,as expected, was exactly the right amount!
Then, Sam was lost in thought and began to talk with the woman.“Madam, it is incorrect to judge one by the appearance”he said seriously. Shame flushed her face. How could she misunderstand a man witha heart of gold Sincerely, she apologized to the man and asked whether she couldoffer him a reward for his kindness.“No, ma'am,” he smiled,“my grandma says a good deed is its own reward.”Interestingly,the man's reply still lingered in Sam's mind even now.
从句、非谓语：...who often comes across dangerous...;when引导的从句:when he was young,...
情绪名词，做主语：...fear came into her heart/ 内心活动：What should she do /How could she
“How dare he follow me here ”she said to herself.
副词/介词短语，做句首：Suddenly.../To her surprise...
原文高频语法句式：续写尽量保持一致
John Blanchard stood up,straightened his army uniform(制服),and studied the crowd making their way through the station.He looked for thegirl whose heart he knew, but whose face he had never seen, the girl with a rose.
His interest in her began thirteen months ago i a library.Taking a book off the shelf,he found himself fascinated,not with the words of the book,but with the notes penciled in the margin (页边的空白).The soft handwriting showed a thoughtfuI soul and brilliant mind. In the front of the book,he discovered the owner's name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he found her address. She lived in New York City.He wrote her aletter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond (通信).The next day he was shipped overseas for military service.
During the next year and one month,the twobegun to know each other by mail. Each letter was a seed falling on both hearts.A romance was budding. Blanchard asked for a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn't matter what she looked like.
When the day finally came for him to return froom Europe, they scheduled their first meeting 7 pm at the Grand Central Station in New York."You'll recognize me,"she wrote."By the red rose I'll wear my dress." So at 7:oo he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he'd never seen.
A young lady was coming toward him. Her figure was long and slim; her blonde hair lay back from her ears; her eyes were blue as flowers; her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime coming alive.He went toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As he rnoved, a middle-aged woman whispered, “Going my way, Sir ”
例
John Blanchard stood up,straightened his army uniform(制服),and studied the crowd making their way through the station.He looked for thegirl whose heart he knew, but whose face he had never seen, the girl with a rose.
His interest in her began thirteen months ago i a library.Taking a book off the shelf,he found himself fascinated,not with the words of the book,but with the notes penciled in the margin (页边的空白).The soft handwriting showed a thoughtfuI soul and brilliant mind. In the front of the book,he discovered the owner's name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he found her address. She lived in New York City.He wrote her aletter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond (通信).The next day he was shipped overseas for military service.
During the next year and one month,the twobegun to know each other by mail. Each letter was a seed falling on both hearts.A romance was budding. Blanchard asked for a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn't matter what she looked like.
例
When the day finally came for him to return froom Europe, they scheduled their first meeting 7 pm at the Grand Central Station in New York."You'll recognize me,"she wrote."By the red rose I'll wear my dress." So at 7:oo he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he'd never seen.（这段描写在强调什么？）
A young lady was coming toward him. Her figure was long and slim; her blonde hair lay back from her ears; her eyes were blue as flowers; her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime coming alive.He went toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As he rnoved, a middle-aged woman whispered, “Going my way, Sir ”
例
占比多的描写：决定主旨关键、情节走向
whose heart he knew 熟识心灵
a thoughtful soul and brilliant mind
深思熟虑的灵魂和聪明的头脑
Blanchard asked for a photograph,but she refused.
...wouldn’t matter what she looked like.
要求寄照片，她拒绝。她认为长相不重要。
“By the red rose I’ll wear my dress”(爽快答应约见，并强调戴玫瑰)
a young lady (大段描写)
a middle-aged woman(一小句话)
结合原文描写占比，分析情节设计
（投1票，1+1=2）
（投0票，0+1=1）
【读原文：5WP1P2+角色特点+描写占比】
1.第一件事：串联首尾段5W1H+P1P2给定句，定事件走向
（1）读首段得知：人物+大致事件
（2）读尾段得知：具体事件+态度（列出所有角色）
（3）读P1P2给定句得知：故事结局走向
2.第二件事：划出关键词（角色特点、关键情节）
（1）划出角色相关描写（adj/v/n）:用来续写角色，改写关键词
（2）划出矛盾/需求，关键情节：用来续写情节，甚至是“升华”
3.观察各类描写占比，续写比例与其一致
（1）看各类描写：续写时尽量占比一致
（2）语法句式：尽量保持一致，也可模仿好句
（3）占比多的描写：关键所在，决定情节走向
构思前：读原文3件事（5WP1P2+角色+描写）
who关键词 动作：V. 情绪/心理：adj. 特点：n./短语
角色1
角色2
角色3
what关键句 P1P2关键句 3W1H

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