资源简介

(共23张PPT)
读后续写
目录
概况
真题演练
动作链 动作面
动作描写
环境描写
情绪描写
语言描写
概况
根据一段350左右的语言材料，要求考生根据材料内容、所给段落开头进行续写（150词左右），将其发展为一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文，在此过程中，开展动作、心理、语言、环境等细节描写
读懂文本信息，厘清文章脉络
续写要关注故事的发展进程、前因后果、人物特征和情感变化
评分
篇章的逻辑和衔接、情节的推进和融洽、语言的丰富和准确、文章的贯通和流畅
续写得分技巧
内容上鼓励大胆想象，有创新意识（不离奇，重逻辑），情节丰富，尽可能合理展开，并注意前后文呼应，与原文融洽度高。
写作尽可能传递正能量.要提炼有思想性、体现价值观和传递正能量的元素（例如珍爱生命，学会合作，学会感恩等）
记叙文语言表达流畅，避免低级语法错误，注意连接词的正确使用，使上下文连贯；注意句子结构的多样性和语言的丰富性。
检查，誊写---检查文章的连贯性、逻辑性，规范性。最后誊写要做到字迹工整，清晰美观。
读后续写策略（Strategy of continuation）
起始部分：情节基调
核心矛盾
框架完整
中间部分：顺延故事发展
语言文体
遣词用句
情节走向
Ending：合情合理的创意
不着痕迹
情节内容
框架结构
语篇段落
Beginning
Climax
Ending
Setting
When
Where
Who
What happened
Why
How it will develop
Problem
Feeling
Solution
Theme
Build-up
Resolution
操作步骤
边读边想象场景，在大脑屮构造画面、拍电影。
边读边用中文把主要情节写下来。（可以避免反复看原文而浪费时间）
主要情节即“记叙文六要素”：人物、时间、地点、起因 、经过、结果（谁在什么时间、什么地方，因为什么、做了什么、最终怎样。)
五个一致
注意确保五个一致：
1.要与原文的主题或作者的本来意图保持一致。
2.要与原文的体裁、结构、写作手法保持一致。
3.要与原文在人称，主体时态上保持一致。
4.要与人物的思想行为、性格特点保持一致。
5.要与原文的语言特点和叙事风格保持一致。
when
who
where
why
how
what
确定文章的主体时态
确定发生地点，激活环境词汇
用第几人称叙述，确定“入戏”人物，
各自扮演何种角色
通过逻辑，确定故事发展的可能性
确定故事发展的每个阶段:开始的写作部分
考查点，通过以上要素，确定续写内容
探讨六要素的意义
真题演练
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day. How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed. They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge. They had watched their mother in the kitchen. There was nothing to it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen. They decided to boil the porridge first. They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast. Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk. Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next, Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan. Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds. Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread. This time, she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake. The next minute, the porridge boiled over and put out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly. But the stove was a mess now. Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge. But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cold water. Then she caught the smell of burning. Oh dear! The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared.______________________
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. ________________________
Setting When Mother’s Day Who Jenna and Jeff, Dad, Mum
Where At home kitchen — upstairs What Plan a surprise for Mother’s Day
时空线 情节线 情感线
6:00 am kitchen Excited
4. The bread got burnt.
5. The porridge became a mess.
6. The second bread turned black.
3. The beginning went well.
fine
2. The twins thought they knew the job.
1.The twins planned a breakfast.
panicked
Losing confidence
under control
confident
Dad appeared
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs
What would happen
How would the characters feel
What’s the theme of the story
构思与续写
优化词汇和句式，添加恰当描写，加入衔接手段等
What would happen
① How did their father feel on seeing the mess
② How did their father help the twins
③ What did their father make for breakfast
④ What did the twins prepare at last
Para.1 As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared.
Para.2 The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up
The twins were confident to prepare the breakfast for their mother but made everything a mess.
① What would the twins say to their mother
② How did their mother react when she saw the breakfast
③ What did their father do
④ What did they understand and realize from this incident
Connection
Connection
theme
Exercise
Finish continuation writing according to the analysis.
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. One look and he knew what they were up to. Seeing their discouraged faces, he told them to clean up the kitchen first and he would help to make breakfast for Mother. Under their father’s instruction, Jeff stood by the pot and stirred the porridge from time to time while Jenna carefully fried the French toast. “Eyes on your task!” the father reminded. Before long, the breakfast was ready.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. Opening her eyes, the mother even couldn’t believe what she saw! Standing in front of her were the twins, with Jenna holding a delicate French toast and Jeff a bowl of chicken porridge, followed by “Mom, We love you!” from the kids. So shocked and delighted was she that she hugged the twins tightly, tears of joy welling up in her eyes, “Thanks, my dear kids.” It was not only the surprise, but the love of the children for her that moved her very much. That whole morning witnessed a happy time spent among them with everyone bathed in the warmth of a family. What a loving scene!
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. Faced with the mess the twins had made of the kitchen, Father felt annoyed but tried to contain himself. Jenna ran up to him, whispering “We…We just want to make breakfast for Mom as Mother’s Day gift.” After he learned what all was about, his annoyance gave way to relief and delight. Immediately, he joined them and they started all over again. Soon the French toast and chicken porridge were ready, the kitchen filled with the scent of breakfast and sweetness of a family. Looking at the work, the three exchanged an understanding smile. After signaling them to keep it a secret, Father slipped into the bedroom, pretending to know nothing about it.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. Still a little sleepy, Mother failed to figure out what they were up to. “Happy Mother’s Day!” The twins congratulated. “We made breakfast for you as you do that for us. Mom, we love you!” Though still in her pajamas, Mother took a bite of the toast and sipped the hot porridge. Lost in the delicious breakfast and pure love from her twins, she sobbed, with delightful tears streaming down her face. Lovingly, she pressed two gentle kisses on their foreheads, proudly enjoying their best wishes. Their father was standing in the doorway, recording this touching scene. The whole room was bathed in a happy Mother’s Day atmosphere.
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. Seeing the mess, Father froze with shock, as if rooted on the ground. From the black bread and the spilled porridge, he suddenly figured out their secret. A smile of understanding flashed across his face. He realized their intention. He joined them in preparing the Mother’s Day surprise immediately. They started all over again. Everything went smoothly. The chicken and rice were dancing harmoniously in the boiling water pot and bread slices were showing off its most tremendous golden color. Soon the French toast and chicken porridge were ready, the kitchen filled with the scent of breakfast and sweetness of a family. Despite the oil stains on the twins’ aprons, nothing seemed imperfect, and all was in place except the most important one.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. Still a little sleepy, mother failed to figure out what they were up to, but the cheerful “Happy Mother’s Day” from the two sweeties brought her back to reality. The breakfast with love made by her twins really struck her heartstrings. Mother kissed them and gave them each a bear hug, saying “Oh dear, thank you my sweeties. What a big surprise!” The next moment, she woke up father, eager to share the blessing and the inviting breakfast seasoned with love. Father, who had been awake, cooperatively rubbed his eyes and took a big bite, winking at the twins secretly. After all, the surprise did make a sweet surprise!
续写中存在的主要问题
*阅读方面，学生的问题主要是词汇贫乏和阅读能力不够或时间紧张没有意识到解读文本的重要性；
*续写写作部分，主要在内容（逻辑性、合理性），词汇和语法（丰富、准确），以及语篇（连贯性，前后呼应）这三大方面存在问题
内容（逻辑性、合理性）---情节构建中的问题
*文章理解不到位，续写情节与原文脱离。
*情节没有得以展开，体现不出丰富新颖。
*所创设的情境违背真实生活，缺乏合理性。
*融洽度不高，衔接不合理。
*大量对话无意义，段落间分布不均衡。
*主题升华牵强或跑偏。
词汇和语法方面存在的问题：
*词汇---使用过多的上义词，不会替换相应下义词；
重复使用同一词语；
基础词汇拼写及词性错误较多
*语法---通篇都是简单句的堆积；
非谓语的使用出现语法错误；
时态、语态的错误；
低级语言错误(如主宾格不分，谓语动词单复数使用混乱等)
语篇的衔接连贯方面：
*衔接不符合逻辑，如要求续写的第一段最后一句与所给第二段首句连接不当，或两段间毫不关联；
*句句间逻辑不严密，不能有效借助连词、代词、副词等语言手段建立清晰合理的逻辑关系。

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