资源简介 2024年2月云南师大附中高三统测读后续写 (略有改动)I went out one early November morning last year to walk the dogs, a break from caring for my husband, Dale. Our neighbors Mr. and Mrs. Thompson were passing by with their dogs too. I told them how weak Dale was. Even though he was finally home from the hospital after suffering two strokes and a heart attack, his breathing still labored from his initial Covid infection in September. I looked down our street, at the homes that would soon be lit in a communal holiday display, and pushed away the thought that this Christmas might be Dale’s last. “We’ll have to skip lighting up this year,” I said. “Dale’s all that matters, and I need to get these dogs walked so I can get back to him.” The couple offered to take care of our Christmas lights, but I turned their offer down because it was just too big a job.去年11月的一个清晨,我出去遛狗,这是我照顾丈夫戴尔的休息时间。我们的邻居Mr。汤普森太太也带着他们的狗路过。我告诉他们戴尔有多虚弱。尽管他在经历了两次中风和心脏病发作后终于出院回家,但由于9月份首次感染新冠肺炎病毒,他的呼吸仍很困难。我顺着街道往下看,看着即将在公共节日展示中点亮的房屋,打消了今年圣诞节可能是戴尔最后一个圣诞节的想法。“今年我们将不得不放弃照明,”我说。“戴尔才是最重要的,我需要让这些狗走一走,这样我才能回到他身边。”这对夫妇提出要照顾我们的圣诞彩灯,但我拒绝了他们的提议,因为这项工作太大了。We usually went all out, cleaning the house, wrapping the tree, lining the yard and driveway with candy canes. It was a full day’s work for Dale and me. Actually, Christmas was the reason we’d moved to Ashby Avenue in one of Des Moines’ must-see holiday neighborhoods. For the entire month of December, cars paraded down the streets from 6 to 10 pm. Carolers (唱诗班) and community groups filled the sidewalks. The whole neighborhood took on a festive air. I’d always dreamed of being part of it, and when Dale and I heard the news that there was a house going on the market three years ago, we jumped at the chance.我们通常会全力以赴,打扫房子,包树,用拐杖把院子和车道弄得整整齐齐。对戴尔和我来说,这是一整天的工作。事实上,圣诞节是我们搬到得梅因必看度假区之一的阿什比大道的原因。整个12月,汽车从下午6点到10点在街上游行(唱诗班) 社区团体挤满了人行道。整个街区都洋溢着节日的气氛。我一直梦想着成为其中的一员,三年前,当Dale和我听到有房子上市的消息时,我们抓住了这个机会。I returned with the dogs as fast as I could, in the meantime, feeling sad that we wouldn’t be able to celebrate Christmas as we used to do. Dale was lying on the bed awake, his eyes staring out of the window. I helped him sit up. He wasn’t able to talk much, but we only grew closer in our quiet time together.与此同时,我尽快带着狗回来了,因为我们不能像过去那样庆祝圣诞节,我感到很难过。戴尔醒着躺在床上,眼睛盯着窗外。我帮他坐起来。他不太会说话,但我们只是在平静的相处中越来越亲密。 Paragraph 1: The phone rang a few days after I’d run into the fellow dog-walkers.__________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Paragraph 2: On the night of Christmas Eve, I pressed the switch to light up the house.__________________________________________________________________________________________________________注:1. 考卷中并没有任何下划线词汇。我们刻意标出这些词汇是想展现续写和原文概念的互动。还不太明白这样做的道理的朋友请回顾:《为什么高考英语浙江卷读后续写值得我们重点关注?》2. 考卷中原文可能存在人物信息遗漏的瑕疵。在原文第一段中没有明确the couple的具体身份。我们对此进行了修改,将他们的身份明确为:Mr. and Mrs. Thompson。文章中文梗概作者“我”和“我”的丈夫Dale住在一个因圣诞节灯饰氛围而闻名的社区。和其他邻居一样,每年圣诞节我们都会用心用灯饰装点自己的房子。不幸的是,Dale自从9月份感染新冠后,经历了两次中风和一次心脏病,尽管已经出院,但身体仍然虚弱,卧床在家。照顾Dale的重担落到了作者“我”身上。11月的一个清晨,“我”在照顾身体虚弱的丈夫Dale的间隙出门遛狗时遇到了同样在社区里遛狗的Thompson夫妇。在交谈中 “我”告诉这对邻居夫妇今年忙于照料时日无多的丈夫,没法再像往年一样装饰自己的房子和周边了。尽管邻居Thompson夫妇主动提出帮忙做圣诞灯饰,但“我”还是婉拒了。 续写重点从续写第一段的段首句信息可知,几天之后“我”接到了一个电话。很明显,续写应该延着电话的内容和来电人展开。本着“非必要不增加主要新人物”的写作原则,来电话的人最好就是Thompson夫妇。从续写第二段的段首句(I pressed the switch to light up the house)不难看出,圣诞节前灯饰应该安装好了。很明显,装灯饰不是作者“我”和生病的丈夫Dale做的。有一种简单而且合理的情节设置方式:邻居Thompson夫妇帮助完成了今年的圣诞灯饰。此举展现了邻里互助,延续了社区圣诞传统。写作示范The phone rang a few days after I'd run into the fellow dog-walkers. The voice on the other end was Mrs. Thompson's. "We're putting together a little surprise for you and Dale," she said, her voice filled with excitement and a hint of secrecy. I hesitated at first, but her promise that it would be hassle-free convinced me to agree. True to her word, by evening, a small group of neighbors quietly came together, hanging lights across the bushes and along the porch railing, bringing back the festive air that Dale and I always loved to create. Glancing at Dale, I saw his eyes light up at our friends' work, a clear sign of the cherished community bond. (105 words) On the night of Christmas Eve, I pressed the switch to light up the house. The neighborhood glowed warmly, and carolers' soft songs filled the air, just like before. Dale watched from the window, his eyes on the twinkling lights breaking through the dark, reminding me of the joy he brought into my life. "Look, honey, it's just like we planned," I told him, holding his hand. A soft smile appeared on his face, showing the same strength and brightness that brought us to Ashby Avenue. In the window's reflection, the lights mixed with our image, symbolizing the life we built together, shining and lasting through the darkest nights. (94 words)写作细节分析The phone rang a few days after I'd run into the fellow dog-walkers. The voice on the other end was Mrs. Thompson's.(合理叙事:和遛狗遇到的好心邻居Thompson夫妇产生联系)"We're putting together a little surprise for you and Dale," she said, her voice filled with excitement and a hint of secrecy.(烘托氛围:一丝神秘感)I hesitated at first, but her promise that it would be hassle-free convinced me to agree. True to her word, by evening, a small group of neighbors quietly came together, hanging lights across the bushes and along the porch railing, bringing back the festive airthat Dale and I always loved to create.(和原文概念高度互动:邻里、社区、灯饰、节日氛围。和第二段续写首句点亮灯饰合理衔接) Glancing at Dale, I saw his eyes light up at our friends' work, a clear sign of the cherished community bond.(合理叙事:邻里之间的互助互爱)On the night of Christmas Eve, I pressed the switch to light up the house. The neighborhood glowed warmly, and carolers' soft songs filled the air, just like before. Dale watched from the window, his eyes on the twinkling lights breaking through the dark, reminding me of the joy he brought into my life. "Look, honey, it's just like we planned,"(恰当而且必要的主要人物之间的对话描写) I told him, holding his hand.(恰当的动作描写:十指相扣) A soft smile appeared on his face, showing the same strength and brightness that brought us to Ashby Avenue.(写作主题明确:社区邻里关系)In the window's reflection, the lights mixed with our image, symbolizing the life we built together, shining and lasting through the darkest nights. (积极的文末主题提炼:黑夜里的一丝光亮) 词汇和表达积累a hint of secrecy 一丝神秘hassle-free adj. 不麻烦的,轻松的eyes light up 眼睛亮了起来community bond 社区联系(情感联系)window's reflection 窗户的倒影 展开更多...... 收起↑ 资源预览