资源简介

(共25张PPT)
读后续写——2024九省联考
CONTENTS
目录
01 阅读分析
02 写作流程
故事框架整理
故事大纲
Background Rising Action + Climax Falling Action Resolution
人物 人设 问题：矛盾/冲突 如何解决 故事结局 文章结尾
原文回顾
Last summer, Hilda worked as a volunteer with dolphin trainers at a sea life park. Her job was to make sure the tanks were free of any items so that the trainers could train the dolphins to fetch specific items. However, one day after cleaning, one of the dolphins, Maya, presented Hilda with a candy wrapper from the tank. When Katherine, the trainer, saw this, she blamed Hilda for her carelessness. Upset but not discouraged by this event, Hilda decided to do some spying on Maya.
人物介绍
主要冲突：K责备H
H有错，后面改正
H没错，K道歉
故事框架整理
故事大纲
Background Rising Action + Climax Falling Action Resolution
人物 人设 问题：矛盾/冲突 如何解决 故事结局 文章结尾
人物
Maya
Hilda
Katherine
人设
海豚
海洋馆清理工
海豚训练师
矛盾/冲突
在Hilda打扫干净水池之后，Maya衔来了糖纸，Katherine认为Hilda没有认真工作
如何解决
？？？
原文回顾
Last summer, Hilda worked as a volunteer with dolphin trainers at a sea life park. Her job was to make sure the tanks were free of any items so that the trainers could train the dolphins to fetch specific items. However, one day after cleaning, one of the dolphins, Maya, presented Hilda with a candy wrapper from the tank. When Katherine, the trainer, saw this, she blamed Hilda for her carelessness. Upset but not discouraged by this event, Hilda decided to do some spying on Maya.
人物介绍
Hilda 决定追踪Maya 一探究竟
原文回顾
The next morning, Hilda arrived at the park early. She put on her scuba gear (水下呼吸器) and jumped into the tank for her usual, underwater sweep. Finding nothing in the tank, she climbed out of the water just in time to see Katherine jumping in on the other side. After what happened yesterday, Hilda knew what she was doing. She watched as Katherine performed her underwater search, but Hilda wasn’t surprised when she surfaced empty-handed.
次日，Hilda 下水检查没有发现任何东西
同时看到，Katherine 也下水检查，不出意外，也没有任何东西
Katherine 对Hilda 的工作不放心，不信任
原文回顾
During the tank sweeps, Maya had been swimming playfully, but now the dolphin stopped suddenly and swam to the back part of the tank where the filter (过滤) box was located. She stuck her nose down behind the box and then swam away. What was Maya doing back there Hilda wondered. She jumped back into the water and swam over to take a look behind the box, and her question was answered. Hilda then swam across the tank following Maya’s path and emerged from the water to find Katherine removing her scuba gear. As Katherine turned around, her mouth dropped open. There was Maya at the edge of the tank with a comb (梳子) in her mouth waiting for her treat.
Maya 游到过滤器之后，把鼻子伸进过滤器后面
Hilda 疑惑地再次跳入水中，发现了Maya的秘密
Maya给Katherine衔来了一把梳子，并等待她的投喂
原文回顾
“Maya! Where did you get that ” demanded Katherine, taking the comb and throwing her a fish. “I know where she got it,” declared Hilda climbing out of the tank with a handful of items still wet from their watery, resting place. “What’s all this ” Katherine asked, obviously confused.
Katherine 对Maya 衔来的梳子感到疑惑
Katherine 对我手里的东西感到疑惑
知道真相的我，爬出水面，手里拿着一把东西
原文回顾
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
Hilda 的解释
Katherine 的道歉
逻辑梳理
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Hilda 的解释
Maya 的秘密
手里的东西
糖纸和梳子从哪儿来
是什么
过滤箱之后
为什么过滤箱之后
会有这些东西？
Maya 做的
为什么这么做？
写作框架
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Hilda 说
1、糖纸和梳子是从过滤箱之后找到的。
2、是Maya 做的，因为……原因。
3、我手里的东西是……。
写作框架
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Hilda 说
1、糖纸和梳子是从过滤箱之后找到的。
2、是Maya 做的，因为……原因。
3、我手里的东西是……。
范文一：
Hilda laid out the items on the ground: a plastic spoon, several candy wrappers, and even a pair of sun glasses. Hilda continued, “Maya has been collecting things from the tank. It seems Maya is playing a game of treasure hunting. She hides the items behind the filter box, which is her own treasure cave.”
写作框架
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Hilda 说
1、糖纸和梳子是从过滤箱之后找到的。
2、是Maya 做的，因为……原因。
3、我手里的东西是……。
范文二：
Hilda laid out the items on the ground: a plastic spoon, several candy wrappers, and even a pair of sun glasses. Hilda continued, “Maya has been collecting things from the tank, hiding them near the filter box in the back of the tank. The reason why she does this is that she wants to get treats from you.”
写作框架
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
Hilda 说
1、糖纸和梳子是从过滤箱之后找到的。
2、是Maya 做的，因为……原因。
3、我手里的东西是……。
字数不够怎么办？
1、先构建动作完成段落主要内容描述
2、补充其他描述
（外貌、语言、心理、神态、性格、场景、环境）
写作框架
Para1: “This is Maya’s secret,” Hilda said with a big smile.
范文二：
Hilda laid out the items on the ground: a plastic spoon, several candy wrappers, and even a pair of sun glasses. Hilda continued, “Maya has been collecting things from the tank, hiding them near the filter box in the back of the tank. The reason why she does this is that she wants to get treats from you.”
性格描写
聪明
场景描写
Maya此刻的动作
Maya is a clever dolphin.
Maya is much more intelligent than we thought.
She looked at Maya, who was now playfully swimming in the pool.
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
Katherine 道歉
故事结局
作者写这篇文章的意义何在？
文章结尾
从故事中升华的道理
务实！！！！！
不能轻易评判他人
对海豚的关心
从误会分歧，到加强合作
Katherine 意识到了什么？
不是Hilda 的错误
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
1、前文情节概括。
2、Katherine认识到自己的错误，并向Hilda道歉。
3、文章主旨升华。
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
1、前文情节概括。
范文一：
Those object were not Hilda’s mistakes or carelessness, but the symbols of Maya’s playful nature and intelligence.
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
Katherine apologized to Hilda sincerely.
2、Katherine认识到自己的错误，并向Hilda道歉。
重要情节应该有浓墨重彩的描写。
道歉是动作也可以是语言。
补充神态、心理、原因来表示道歉的真诚。
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
Feeling a mix of regret and guilt.【心理描写】， “I owe you an apology, and I shouldn’t blamed you earlier”【语言描写】Katherine turned to Hilda and said sincerely【动作描写】, grateful for her keen observation and patience.
2、Katherine认识到自己的错误，并向Hilda道歉。
At that moment, the two exchanged a knowing smile and turned their gaze towards Maya.【对道歉动作的反馈】
写作框架
Para2: Now Katherine realized what had been going on.
This incident remind them of the surprising nature of this clever creature and the trust between a team.
3、文章主旨升华。
From then on, they began to discuss more effective ways to learn Maya so as to improve their approach to dolphin training and care.
常见描写积累
1、动作描写：拿来东西
Maya presented Hilda with a candy wrapper from the tank.
2、心理描写：收到批评后的心理
Upset but not discouraged by this event, sb decided to do sth.
3、动作描写：借鉴昨日经验
After what happened yesterday, sb knew what to do.
4、语言描写：边做边说
“I know where she got it,” declared Hilda doing sth.
常见描写积累
5、道歉连续动作
Feeling a mix of regret and guilt.【心理描写】， “I owe you an apology, and I shouldn’t do sth”【语言描写】人物A turned to 人物B and said sincerely【动作描写】, grateful for 对方的行为.
常见描写积累
6、合作主题
This incident remind them of the trust among a team. From then on, they began to discuss more effective ways to interact with each other so as to improve their approach to 工作内容.

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