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读后续写讲评课
2024年高三英语二轮复习
catalogue
读后续写的困境
如何筹备讲评课（讲评前）
教学步骤展示（讲评中）
讲评后的闭环（讲评后）
读后续写的困境
1
日常教学中，大家认为讲评课有哪些困境呢？
教师“一言堂”，缺乏课堂互动
形式单一，缺乏思维训练
缺乏做题技巧和方法指导
缺乏对学生情绪的关注
讲评的目标
教学目标
语言能力目标
拉波夫叙事结构把握主旨，故事山图式梳理情节
过程与方法目标
小组合作和讨论；对作文进行二次润色与修改。
情感态度与价值观目标
培养学生的批判性思维，客观分析自己的写作成绩，勇于面对不足，积极要求改进。
正确的学习态度和价值观，重视自我反思与成长。
教学重点与难点
分析文章的主旨和人物的性格特点
在续写中实现续文内容和原文协同
如何筹备讲评课（讲评前）
2
1. 数据支持
2. 小组统计
考评分析
学情分析
讲评前--考情和学情
自我诊断表 姓名：_________ 考试总分：___________ 自我纠错后总分：____________ 总分差：___________
题号 卷面得分 错因分析 可改进方面
读后续写
错因：
1. 审题不清 2. 遗漏要点 3. 理解不透 4. 情节衔接不合理 5. 表述不清 6. 对话题过多 7. 描写不当 8. 时间分配不合理 9. 其他原因
教学步骤展示（讲评中）
3
阅读圈模式
角色 任务
组长 (discussion leader) 负责针对阅读材料进行提问，组织小组成员进行讨论。
总结概括者 (summarizer) 负责对阅读材料进行总结、分析文本结构特征。
文化连接者 (culture collector) 负责寻找并对比阅读材料中出现的与中国文化的异同之处；并邀请同伴进行讨论。
实际生活联结者 （connector） 负责从阅读材料中找出与生活相关的现象, 并邀请同伴分享。
词汇大师(word master) 负责解决阅读材料中重难点或具有重要或特殊意义的单词和短语，并阐述原因，作出评价。
篇章解读者 (passage person) 鉴赏且挑选并阐释阅读材料中具有重要或特殊意义或好的文字段落；解释原因，作出评价。
阅读圈小组合作角色
Discussion Leader：
负责分配组员任务和
解答疑难问题
Word Master：
负责查阅生词
Passage
Person：
分析语篇
Sentence
analyzer：
负责长难句的
分析和解构
Summarizer：
负责文章主题的总结归纳
Correspondent：
协调各小组的成员任务；负责收交反馈表，和老师沟通
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。（2024市一模） Donna is my sister, and I had always considered her beautiful. Our father called her his princess, and in high school, she was known as the school babe. Our parents were protective of us, particularly our father, who kept close watch over the friends she made.
One Saturday in April, a boy invited Donna to a park with four other friends. Unfortunately, on their way to the park, their car crashed into a guardrail and flipped over three times before it came to a stop on its roof. Donna was pulled from the car and rushed to the hospital without delay.
Donna was in the hospital for two weeks. Many of her friends went to see her, especially Claudia, who was there a lot. However, Mom and Dad never liked Claudia. I don’t really know why. They just didn’t like her being around.
Donna returned home with the entire top half of her head shaved. She had hundreds of stitches (缝线), some of which came across her forehead and between her left eye and eyebrow. Knowing Donna’s concern for her appearance, Mom found her a human hair wig (假发) that perfectly matched her hair.
Donna finally recovered and went back to school. But she never felt good in school. There was a very loud-mouthed, self-centered girl in Donna’s class who took great pleasure in teasing her. This girl, seated behind Donna, would pull slightly on Donna’s wig and mockingly said, “Hey, Wiggy, let’s see your scars (伤疤)” . Then she would laugh.
Donna endured this mistreatment in silence until the day she told Claudia. From then on, Claudia kept a close eye on my sister, preventing anyone from bothering her. There was something about Claudia that was frightening, even to the worst kids in school. Nobody messed with her. Unfortunately, though, Claudia wasn’t always around, and the teasing and name-calling continued.
One day, Claudia came to our home with a special surprise. ____________________________
Donna and Claudia wore their wigs for over a year. ___________________________________
教学设计流程图
教学步骤
步骤一：自由讨论，激活话题语言（2分钟）【师生互动】
Questions:
Q1: What do you usually do with a friend
Q2: Suppose your friend was teased by others, what would you do for him/her
Suggested answers:
I stood up for my friend and defending them against the bullies, or at least trying to create a safe space for them . Additionally, I would encourage my friend to stay strong and resilient, reminding them that the bullies' words and actions do not define them and that they have the power to overcome this difficult period.
步骤二：问题引导，梳理故事框架（2分钟）【师生互动】
Pick out the main elements of the story.
Questions:
Q1: Where and when did the story take place
Q2: Who were involved in the story
Q3: What happened in the story
Q4: How and why did it happen
读写活动的设计模式
获取信息
整合信息
迁移运用
步骤三：小组展示，解读文章主题（8分钟）【生生互动】
Group representatives make presentations before class.
成长--友谊
人与自我
人物分析
情节发展
主题语境
主旨
Donna
Claudia
Plot line
● beginning/setting/
Inciting incident (para ___)
情节/情感
● rising action
(para ___) 情节/情感
● climax
(para ___)
情节/情感
● falling action
(续写para 1)
● ending/
resolution
(续写para2)
Reread the story and figure out the plot.
Donna and her friends encountered a car accident while going out and were hospitalized.
（Donna） panic and fear
Donna recovered and returned to school, but faced mocks for her injuried appearance.
(Donna) unease, anxiety, frustration and powerlessness
Donna kept silent about being bullied until she told Claudia, who protected her, but the teasing continued when Claudia wasn't around.
(Donna) helpless
(Claudia) determined and fearless
续写部分
续写部分
篇章概括者 Summarizer
Donna, my sister, who was involved in a car accident and later bullied at school, enduring the mockery in silence until Claudia, her loyal friend, came to her aid, despite their parents' disapproval of their friendship.
步骤四：分析人物性格，探究写作手法（5分钟）【师生互动】
Identify and generalize writing features on shaping a character in the story.
Questions:
Q1: What kind of person was Donna How was it revealed in the story
Q2: What kind of person was Claudia How was it revealed in the story
Q3: How do we shape a character
步骤五：评析学生一模读后续写作文（5分钟）【师生互动】
TEAMS框架
T 是指Transitional sentences衔接句或 Theme主题句;
E 是指Emotion / Enviromental心理描写/环境描写;
A是指Action动作(链)和 Appearance 外貌神态描写;
M是指Monologue or Conversation 独白/对话;
S是指Style语言风格。
步骤六：小组合作，重写作文（8分钟）【生生互动】
checklist
Donna’s action Do the descriptions of Donna’s action show her feeling ( )
Donna’s emotion Do the descriptions of Donna’s speech show her feeling ( )
Claudia’s action Do the descriptions of Claudia’s action show her consideration and care for Donna ( )
Claudia’s emotion Do the descriptions of Claudia’s speech show her consideration and care for Donna ( )
theme Is their friendship well revealed in your writing ( )
步骤七：结合评价标准生生互评，赏析高分卷作文（5分钟）【师生互动】
方向 维度 标准 学生评审 教师反馈 修订和再审查
整体结构和逻辑 情节流畅性 与前文融洽度高，与续写开头语衔接合理。续写的每一段紧贴所给首句的线索。内容要丰富，情节的发展由丰富和生动的细节来推动。
角色发展 检查主要角色的发展是否合理，是否有足够的情感转变和成长
段落结构 检查段落是否合理衔接、拓展和收尾
语言和修辞检查 修辞手法 检查是否使用了多样的修辞手法如比喻、隐喻、排比等，以增强文章的表现力。
词汇选择 仔细选择适当的词汇，确保用词准确、贴切，避免重复和模糊表达。
句式变化 确保句子结构的变化，避免单一句式的重复使用，尝试多样的句子结构。
语法和拼写检查 语法错误 仔细检查语法错误,包括主谓一致时态一致、冠词使用等。
拼写错误 逐字逐句检查拼写错误。
标点符号 确保正确使用标点符号，避免句子结构混乱或歧义。
步骤八：创新迁移、能力升级（课后提升设计）
活动1：佳句仿写：
1.请仿照以下句子，写一句描述性的句子，展现人物的心理状态或动作特点：
原句： Donna never felt good in school, always afraid of the mockery and stares from her classmates.
仿写：自从那次意外后，John每次走在街上都感到不安，总是不时地回头瞥一眼过路人的怀疑目光。
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
After the accident, John never walked down the street without a sense of unease, constantly glancing over his shoulder at the suspicious glances from passersby.
2.请仿照以下句子，写一句描述你或你朋友在面对困境时展现出的勇气和决心：
原句： Donna knew she had Claudia as a strong backup, giving her the courage to face the bullies head-on.
仿写：
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
My friend Jack realized he had his family's unwavering support, which empowered him to stand firmly against the challenges ahead.
步骤八：创新迁移、能力升级
活动2：翻译
请将以下中文句子翻译成英文，注意运用适当的描写手法：
1.“那天阳光明媚，我独自走在小巷中，突然听到一阵急促的脚步声，心中不禁一紧。回头一看，只见一个陌生人正快速朝我走来，他的眼神充满了警惕与疑惑。”
英文翻译：______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
On that sunny day, I walked alone in the alley, suddenly hearing the sound of hurried footsteps. My heart tightened involuntarily. Turning back, I saw a stranger approaching me quickly, his eyes filled with caution and suspicion.
步骤八：创新创新迁移、能力升级
活动2：翻译
请将以下中文句子翻译成英文，注意运用适当的描写手法：
2.“尽管遭受了严重的伤害，Donna依然保持着乐观的态度，她坚信在Claudia的帮助下，自己能够战胜困难，重新找回生活的美好。”
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Despite suffering from severe injuries, Donna maintained an optimistic attitude, firmly believing that with Claudia's help, she would overcome the difficulties and regain the beauty of life.
讲评后的闭环（讲评后）
4
小结
1. 更加重视“读”的环节
2. 在写作过程中注意细节描写和情节推进的比例平衡
3.注重讲评课从学生理解、应用实践以及迁移创新的层层递进
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