资源简介

(共24张PPT)
2021年全国Ⅰ卷读后续写
A Mother’s day surprise
Brainstorm: What impress you most in the video
生活实际联结者 Connector
Have you prepared a gift for your mom on the Mother’s Day
What did you choose
读后续写之如何读
continuation writing
——戴着镣铐的舞蹈
文本分析
part1
A MOTHER'S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day.How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed.They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge.They had watched their mother do them in the kitchen. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
why : 故事起因
twins
Mother
Jenna and Jeff
who : 主角
Excited，confident（自信）
The twins Jeff and Jenna planned to make breakfast for their mother as a Mother's Day surprise
开头（beginning）
The big day came at last.The alarm rang at 6 am.The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen.They decided to boil the porridge first.They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast.Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture.Next,Jeff turned on the burner to heat up the frying pan.Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds.Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread.This time,she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
where: 地点
what: 故事开端
went well，under control(控制)
发展阶段（development）
锅太热，面包变黑
Everything went smoothly until Jeff burnt the piece of bread.
when: 故事时间
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake.The next minute,the porridge boiled over and put out the fire.Jenna panicked.Thankfully,Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly.But the stove was a mess now.Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge.But Jeff's hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain.Jenna made him put his hand in cold water.Then she caught the smell of burning.Oh dear!The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
They had no cooking experience.
what： 故事发展（矛盾冲突）
煮粥溢出把火浇灭之后，Jenna惊慌失措
Jeff的手碰到了滚烫的火炉，他痛得叫了一声
锅里的面包也变黑了
They couldn't prepare the breakfast without other's help.
panicked（恐慌的）, lose control（控制)
The porridge boiled over, Jeff's hand touched the hot burner and the other piece of the bread turned black.
高潮（climax）
炉子周围一片混乱
The twins planned a breakfast and they thought they knew the job.
The porridge became a mess and the second bread turned black.
Continuation para.2: The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up…
Continuation para.1: Their father appeared….
The beginning went well until the first piece of bread got burnt.
Excited; confident
Fine; under control
Panicked; Lost confidence
Happy; relieved
Sense of achievement
Read for plot & feelings
beginning
ending
双胞胎打算在母亲节给妈妈惊喜，法式吐司和鸡肉粥
面包烤焦了
粥溢出来了，Jenna很恐慌，Jeff保持冷静去清理，手被炉子烫伤了，第二次烤面包也烤焦了
细节1
The next minute, the porridge boiled over and put out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly. But the stove was a mess now.
情节
Para 1:
在父亲的帮助下，早餐终于做好了!
Para 2:
母亲非常惊喜！
找到可呼应的【细节】
父亲要发火
父亲了解情况后，没有发火
父亲和他们一起做早餐
他们很开心
构思情节
细节2
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day.
情节
Para 1:
父亲要发火
父亲了解情况后，没有发火
父亲和他们一起做早餐
在父亲的帮助下，早餐终于做好了!
他们很开心
Para 2:
双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐
母亲非常惊喜！
找到可呼应的【细节】
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
细节3
But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cold water.
情节
Para 1:
父亲要发火
父亲了解情况后，没有发火
父亲和他们一起做早餐
在父亲的帮助下，早餐终于做好了!
他们很开心
Para 2:
双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐
母亲非常惊喜！
母亲注意到Jeff的手
母亲既心疼又感动
收尾点睛
找到可呼应的【细节】
黄金版：加细节(非谓语、副词形容词)—描写
Seeing the the burnt bread and the spilt poridge,
their father frowned(皱眉),asking blunty(径直地), "What
on earth are you doing ”
基础版"what are you doing "their father asked.
How did father feel on seeing the mess
(看到一片狼藉的厨房):父亲双手叉腰,眉头紧皱, 从他的表情判断,很明显他…
②.遣词造句、增加细节，定续写内容
Skill1+skill2:
面部+肢体语言Judging from sb’s voice/ eyes/ expression/ behavior, it was evident that sb was trapped in + 情绪名词. (情绪外露)
从某人的声音/眼神/表情/行为判断,很明显他陷入了…
His eyebrows narrowed and his hands rested
on his hips. Judging from his expression, it was
evident that he was about to explode after seeing the mess.
父亲双手叉腰,眉头紧皱, 从他的表情判断,很明显他气炸了。
②.遣词造句、增加细节，定续写内容
Para.1 As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared.
了解情况后, 蹲下来安慰, 给拥抱/拍肩膀, 说…
Having done…
主+谓语1, 谓语and 谓语3
动作：What did their father do when he knew the plan
How did their father help the twins
Having learned their plan, he knelt down, patted them on their shoulder/ gave them a big hug and comforted, “Time is on our side. Let’s do it together”.
1.They cleaned up the mess, cooked the porridge and toasted the bread once again.
运用分词短语作状语描写人物动作，提高语言的丰富性
动作链:主+谓语1, 谓语and 谓语3
②.遣词造句、增加细节，定续写内容
Para.2：The twins carried the breakfast and woke their mother up.
语言：What did the twins say to cheer up their mother
基础版: They said ：” Happy mother’s day, mummy!”.
黄金版: "Happy Mother's Day! A big surprise for you!". They yelled in chorus（齐声说）, their eyes twinkling with excitement
yell的使用及眼部动作的描写，独立主格的运用，描述了孩子们送给妈妈早餐时非常兴奋的心情。
②.遣词造句、增加细节，定续写内容
Para.2：The twins carried the breakfast and woke their mother up.
动作、面部表情等：How did their mother react and feel when she saw the breakfast
基础版: 1.When mom saw the breakfast, she was moved to tears.
2.She tasted the breakfast, praised the kids and gave them a hug.
黄金版:
1. The moment mom saw the breakfast, her eyes widened up and twinkled with joy.
2.Deeply touched, mom tasted the breakfast, saying that it’s the biggest surprise she has received. So shocked and delighted was she that she hugged the twins tightly, tears of joy welling up in her eyes.
the moment引导从句，非谓语动词V-ed,v-ing 的使用，使语言表达多样化；so+adj.部分倒装的使用，更突出了母亲的的喜悦，tightly使动作描写更加生动。
面部表情描写使故事更打动人。
②.遣词造句、增加细节，定续写内容
Para.2：The twins carried the breakfast and woke their mother up.
How did the twins feel
虽然很累, 但是他们都非常开心和自豪
although/though/as
Exhausted / Worn out as/ though they were, their hearts were filled with nothing else but joy and pride.
As/though 引导让步状从的倒装
完美结局，主题升华
房间里充满爱,多么美好的惊喜啊!
The sun was shining on the proud mother’s face through the windows. What a beautiful and sweet surprise!
感叹句的使用
升华点睛：
亲情和爱。结局应该是一家人其乐融融，家庭和谐，母亲节温馨难忘。Not only was the breakfast a gift but also it was the children’s deep love for thier nother.
通读全文，理清主旨。
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared. His eyebrows narrowed and his hands rested on his hips. Judging from his expression, it was evident that he was about to exploded after seeing the mess. To their relief, having learned their plan, he knelt down, patted them on their shoulder and said, “Time is on our side. Let’s do it together”. Without the slightest hesitation, they cleaned up the mess, cooked the porridge and toasted the bread once again. Before long, armed with the experience of failure and an extra helping hand, the breakfast was ready, giving off pleasant smell.
2021年新高考I卷读后续写范文赏析
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up. Happy Mother’s Day!” yelled the twins. “ a big surprise for you!”Their father laughed heartily and told her that the twins had prepared breakfast for her. So shocked and delighted was she that she hugged the twins tightly, tears of joy welling up in her eyes, “Thanks， my dear kids.” Her face lit up with happiness. She tasted a piece of French toast and said that it was the best breakfast she had ever had. Love filled the whole room. What a beautiful and sweet surprise!
2021年新高考I卷读后续写范文赏析
so…that,倒装
独立主格
生动的语言
感叹句
补充语料
5
素材积累
1. Without a second thought, Dad offered to help. He joined the twins in preparing the Mother’s Day surprise.
2. The twins assisted their father with the breakfast, and it was a pleasure to team up with(合作) their father.
3. He cleaned the kitchen in less than 5 minutes and continued with the unfinished cooking.
4. Soon, the delicious smell of breakfast filled the kitchen.
5. Then he sneaked(蹑手蹑脚地) back to bed.
6. Everything settled, Father left the kitchen, promising to keep their secret.
7. They said “Happy Mother’s Day”, with their eyes twinkling with excitement.
8. Her face lit up with happiness.
9. The moment she saw the breakfast, her eyes widened up and twinkled with excitement.
10. Mother bit into a toast and exclaimed it was the best toast she had ever tasted.
There is one of the most beatiful love in the world, that is the love from children.

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