资源简介

(共18张PPT)
Continuation Writing
读后续写
Mama and Her Bank Account
阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的 故事。
Every Saturday night Mama would sit down by the kitchen table and count out the money Papa had brought home.
“For the rent.” Mama would count out the big silver pieces.
“For the groceries.” Another group of coins.
“I’ll need a notebook.” That would be my sister Christine, my brother Nels or me.
Mama would put one or two coins to the side. We would watch with anxious interest. At last, Papa would ask, “Is that all ” And when Mama nodded, we could relax a little. Mama would look up and smile, “Good. We do not have to go to the Bank.” We were all so proud of Mama’s Bank Account. It gave us such a warm, secure feeling.
When Nels graduated from grammar school, he wanted to go on to high school.
“It will cost a little money,” he said.
Eagerly we gathered around the table. I took down a box and laid it carefully in front of Mama. This was the “Little Bank” . It was used for sudden emergencies, such as the time when Christine broke her arm and had to be taken to a doctor.
Nels listed the costs ofthe things he would need. Mama counted out the money in the Little Bank. There was not enough. “We do not want to go to the Bank,” she
reminded. We all shook our heads.
“I will work in Dillon’s grocery after school,” Nels volunteered.
Mama gave him a bright smile and wrote down a number. “That’s not enough,”
Papa said. Then he took his pipe out of his mouth and looked at it for a long time. “I will give up smoking,” he said suddenly.
Mama reached across the table and touched Papa’s arm. Then she wrote down another figure.
“I will look after the Elvington children every Friday night,” I said. “Christine can help me.”
Now there was enough money. We all felt very good because we did not have to go downtown and draw money out of Mama’s Bank Account.
So many things came out of the Little Bank that year: Christine’s dress for the school play, my little sister Dagmar’s operation... Whatever happened, we always knew we still had the Bank to depend upon.
That was twenty years ago. Last year I sold my first story.
Paragraph 1:
When the check came, I gave it to mama and asked her to put it her Bank Account..____________________________________.
Paragraph 2:
Mama looked at me. “There is no account.”she said.__________________.
注意 :
1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
2. 续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好。
构思续写的步骤
解读前文内容: 1.Read for six elements(5W1H);
2. Read for plots;
3. Read for details.
4. make predictions.
二. 快速构思微型故事：1. 明确故事的主题（基于原文的主题）；
　　　　　　　　　　　2. 把故事说“小”；
　　　　　　　　　　　3. 故事不违背生活逻辑、情感逻辑、思维习惯；
　　　　　　　　　　　4. 善于营造悬念。
三. 进行多维度衔接 （1.与原文的逻辑衔接；2.与所给段首句的衔接；
　　　　　　　　　　3.第一段与第二段的衔接；4.续写内容间的衔接。）
四．设计精彩结尾（哲理式结尾、以景结情、自然结尾）
不添加新人物
不用过多对话
不增加旁支情节
不用负能量结局
不在文末设置悬念
不偏离主题
不违背逻辑常理
续写原则导航
七不原则
Action → Response
（行动引发反应）
Conflict → Solution
（矛盾一定解决）
Negative → Positive
（结局积极向上）
三大原则
续写中常出现的问题
一、书写潦草，卷面涂改;
二、上下文的连贯性差;
三、错词错句多，好词好句少;
四、没有丰富和生动的细节推动情节的发展;
五、与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度差;
[ 获得高分的写作技巧
Tip 1:故事要围绕着主要人物展开。
Tip 2:详细刻画角色及其情感。
Tip 3:使用恰当的衔接词以使故事更有连贯性。
Tip 4:使用恰当的修饰词以使描写更加生动。
Tip 5:做到首尾呼应以使故事更加有条理。
Tip 6:确保第二段和第一段的衔接有逻辑。
读后续写的高分攻略
第五档：21分 25分
第四档：16分 20分
第三档：11分 15分
第二档：6分 10分
第一档：1分 5分
评分标准
01How to Read
一、叙事要素
1.角色： I; Mama
2.视角： 第一人称
3.时空线： home；twenty years ago→when the check came
4.情节线： 20 年前每周六晚上全家人一起分配各项开支→Nels 想要上高中时，需要用钱→全家共同努力凑够学费，不需要动用“银行账户”→ （续写）20 年后我把收入拿给母亲存入银行；母亲揭示银行账户不存在的真相。
5.情感线： 我：secure feeling 有安全感→bright smile 家庭生活中获得温暖→grateful 对母亲感激
二、语言
1.句式：简洁明了的句式，直接而流畅的表达方式
2. 风格：记叙亲切而温暖的家庭生活，多对话，多人物描写
三、主题
母亲用爱与智慧编制了一个能让孩子们获得安全感的谎言；家庭共同应对困境，通过团结和爱建立起互相信任和支持的关系。
01 情节思路：
ARE 原则（Action、Response、Emotion）
第一段：我把支票递给妈妈→①我让妈妈存钱到银行账户→②妈妈表现出惊喜→③妈妈回忆过去困境的感慨；
第二段：妈妈说出账户不存在的真相→④我的感受→⑤我领悟妈妈的用意后的反应→⑥妈妈说出原因。
One possible version:
Paragraph 1:
When the check came, I gave it to Mama and asked her to put it in her Bank Account. “Mama, please put it in the Bank Account,” I insisted. Her eyes widened with a mix of surprise. She carefully held the check in her hands, staring at it for a moment. Memories seemed to flood her eyes as she recalled the days when Papa would bring home money and we would count it together. Mama looked at me, her gaze filled with a bittersweet tenderness.
Paragraph 2:
“There is no account,” she said softly. Her voice carrying a hint of remorse(懊恼). Her words struck me like a blow, shattering the illusion we had cherished for so long. Then I realized it had all been a white lie, a comforting lie to protect us from the harsh realities. In that moment, I understood that our true wealth lay not in the bank account but in the resilience, strength, and love that bound us together. I looked at Mama, grateful for her love and the lessons she had taught us. Mama reached out and held my hand, her eyes filled with love and understanding. “We did what we had to do,” she whispered. “Sometimes, we create lies to provide security to those we love.”(以景结情)
第五档:21分-25分
与所给短文融洽度高，与所提供各段落开头语衔接合理。
内容丰富。
所使用语法结构和词汇丰富，准确，可能有些许错误， 但完全不影响意义表达。
有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文结构紧 凑。
第四档：16分-20分
与所给短文融洽度较高，与所提供各段落开头语衔接较为 合理。
内容比较丰富。
所使用的语法结构和词汇较为丰富、准确，可能有些许错 误，但不影响意义表达。
比较有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文结构 紧凑。
与所给短文关系较为密切，与所提供各段落开头语有一定 程度的衔接；
应用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的要求，虽有一些错误, 但不影响意义的表达；
应用简单的语句间的连接成分，使全文内容连贯。
第三档（11分 15分）
，第二档（6分-10分）
与所给短文有一定的关系，与所提供各段落开头语有一定 程度的衔接；
语法结构单调、词汇项目有限，有些语法结构和词汇方面的错误，影响了意义的表达；
较少使用语句间的连接成分，全文内容缺少连贯性。
第一档（1分 5分）
与所给短文和开头语的衔接较差；
产出内容太少，很少使用短文中标出的关键词语;
语法结构单调、词汇项目很有限，有较多语法结构和词汇
方面的错误，严重影响了意义的表达；
缺乏语句间的连接成分，全文内容不连贯。

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