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(共28张PPT)
微雕动作链助力读后续写
contents
1Lead in
2Divide the action
3Combine a chain of actions.
4Divide Mr Adler’s action
5Modify and beautify the actions
6Modify and beaytify Mr Adler’s actions
7 Writing the outline of Para2.
Learning Activity1
Assessing Activity1
Learning Activity2
Assessing Activity2
Assessing Activity3
Hector
Mr. Adler
Plot& Emotion
1 Beginning
2 Rising action
3 Climax
4 Falling action
5 Ending
Read for the plot and emotion
Competing for the champion
hopefully and proud
Picking up an envelope and opening it.
wide-eyed and surprised
At a loss what to do.
torn by his consciousness
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room
Para2 The next day the entire school came to watch the Fifth Grade Geography Bee
Searching for the answer sheet.
disorganised but good
Lead in
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room.
Hector hesitated
Mr. Adler asked Hector what brought him here.
Hector told the truth and apologized.
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room.
Lead in
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room.
Lead in
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room.
Lead in
Lead in
Para1 Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room.
Lead in
Before he realized it, Hector found himself standing in Mr. Adler’s room. Clutching the envelope in his hands, he hesitated, considering whether to confess or remain silent. Feeling surprised and confused, Mr. Adler looked up from his messy desk and asked,“ Hector, what brings you here ” Taking a deep breath, Hector handed over the envelope and explained everything that had happened, eyes sparkling with tears of regret…
Hector hesitated.
Mr. Adler asked Hector what brought him here.
Hector told the truth and apologized.
How do we write a vivid and dynamic sentence
Create an action chain.
2 Divide the action into several steps.
Hector told Mr. Adler the truth.
Following time order.
Before
After
hand over the envelope
took a
deep breath
told him the truth
apologized
asked for forgiveness
________________ ________________ _________________
Use concrete(具体的）verbs rather than general (笼统的) verbs
Use explain/confess rather than tell
________________ ________________ _________________
explained everything
Pair work
2 Divide the action into several steps.
动词
笼统词 General verbs 具体词 Concrete verbs
walk stroll(溜达) stagger(蹒跚) trudge(跋涉) tiptoe(踮脚走，蹑手蹑脚地走) creep (缓缓行进；潜行）
run charge(猛冲)dart(飞奔)gallop(疾驰)scamper（欢快低奔走）sprint(冲刺)
say/talk announce (宣布) argue(争论) confess（坦白，承认） complain(抱怨) debate(辩论)discuss(讨论) murmur(低语） whisper (低语：耳语) persuade(说服)
cry wail(哭号，恸哭)，sob(啜泣：呜咽)，whimper (抽泣；呜咽)
laugh guffaw(大笑；哄笑) snigger（窃笑；暗笑） chuckle(轻声地笑)
giggle(咯咯地笑；傻笑)
eat bite(咬) chew (咀嚼) devour （狼吞虎咽地吃光) swallow(吞下：咽下）
drink Drain(喝光；喝干) sip(小口喝：抿)
want crave(渴望；热望) desire (渴望：期望)
catch capture(捕获) grasp(抓紧：抓牢) seize(抓住；提住) clutch（紧握）
hit pat(轻拍)beat（敲打；锤砸）strike(撞击）
break crack (裂开；破开)demolish(拆毁，拆除)destroy(摧毁；毁灭)
2 Divide the action into several steps.
Hector told Mr. Adler the truth.
Following time order.
Before
After
hand over the envelope
took a
deep breath
told him the truth
apologized
asked for forgiveness
________________ ________________ _________________
Use concrete(具体的）verbs rather than general (笼统的) verbs
Use explain/confess rather than tell
________________ ________________ _________________
explained everything
Pair work
nose
mind
mouth
mouth
________________ __________________ _________________
took a
deep breath
mustered up his courage to confess.
apologized
Ask your body parts for help.
3 Combine a chain of actions together
________________ ________________ _________________
told him the truth
apologized
hand over the envelope
Hector handed over the envelope, told him the truth and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions.
Hector took a deep breath ,explained everything that happened and aked for forgiveness.
Hector took a deep breath ,mustered up his courage and apologized for opening and reading the questions.
did...did...and did...
4 Divide Mr. Adler’s action into several steps and combine them.
What would Mr. Adler’s action be after Hector told the truth
Group work
________________ ________________ _________________
________________ ________________ _________________
________________ ________________ _________________
4 Divide Mr. Adler’s action into several steps and combine them.
What would Mr. Adler’s action be after Hector told the truth
Group work
________________ ___________________ ____________________
forgave him
praised him for his honesty
promised to rewrite the questions
Mr. Adler forgave his impluse to open the envelope, praised him for his honesty and promised to rewrite the questions.
5 Modify and beautify the actions
Hector told Mr.Adler the truth
Hector took a deep breath, mustered up his courage to confess and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions.
Taking a deep breath, Hector mustered up his courage to tell the truth and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions, with his head drooping/ with his face flushing with shame.
Use doing / done
Add feelings/ emotions
Specify your feelings with body language
5 Modify and beautify the actions
Specify your feelings with body language
one’s face paled with fight
one’s face lit up
one’s face turned red with anger
one’s face flushed/ burned with embarrassment/shame
with tears of... welling up one’s eyes.
with tears of...rolling down one’s eyes.
tears of...brimming over one’s eyes.
one’s eyes sparkled/ twinkled with tears of...
...was shining in one’s eyes
with one’s leg trembling/ shaking...
One’s heart pounded with...
Have butterflies in one’s stomach
lower one’s head.
with one’s head dropping
raised one’s voice
in a gentle voice
grind one’s teeth 咬牙切齿
my hands weresweating
Clutching...in his hands.
5 Modify and beautify the actions
Hector told Mr.Adler the truth
Hector took a deep breath, mustered up his courage to confess and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions.
Taking a deep breath, Hector mustered up his courage to tell the truth and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions, with his head drooping/ with his face flushing with shame.
Use doing / done
Add feelings/ emotions
Specify your feelings with body language
Taking a deep breath, Hector mustered up his courage to confess the truth and apologized for opening the envelope and reading the questions, a wave of regret sweeping over him.
Use some fixed structures.
5 Modify and beautify the actions
Use some fixed structures.
1.A burst/ wave/ flood/ scene of +n.+seize/ grasp/ swallow/ take/ hold of/ wash over/ flood over/ well up/ surge through/ sweep over +sb
2.Use Absolute Structure (独立主格结构）
3. Use Inanimate Subjects (无灵主语）
...
Eg. Hearing what he said, Alice grinned from ear to ear, a wave of happiness flooding over her.
6 Modify and beautify Mr. Adler’s actions
Mr. Adler forgave his impulse to open the envelope praised him for his honesty and promised to rewrite the questions.
Much to his surprise, Mr. Adler forgave his impulse to open the envelope in an understanding and comforting voice and praised him for his honest, promising to rewrite the questions…
What would be Mr. Adler’s action after Hector’s confession
Peer Checklist
7 Expand the outlines of Para.2 with action chains.
Para.2 The next day, the entire school came to watch the fitth Grade Geography Bee.
Pair work
Hector stepped onto the stage.
Hector won.
Hector expressed his thanks.
(Ps : these are not all the outlines of Para.2 , just part of it.)
Standards Score(30)
3-4vebs are used in the sentences(0-10)
All the verbs are grammatically correct.(0-10)
All the sentences are well modified.(0-10)
7 Expand the outlines of Para.2 with action chains.
Para.2 The next day, the entire school came to watch the fitth Grade Geography Bee.
Hector stepped onto the stage.
Hector won.
Hector expressed his thanks.
(PS : these are not all the outlines of Para.2 , just part of it.)
Taking a deep breath, Hector calmed himself down and stepped onto the stage, determined and confident.
When it was his turn, he concentrated his mind and answered all the questions correctly , becoming the final champion.
Surrounded by rounds of applause, Hector bowed low to the audience and exchanged a knowing nod with Mr. Adler, greatful for his understanding and aware the importance of honesty.
Summary
To develop the plot
To make the plot more vivid and dynamic
How
Divide the action into several steps
Combine a chain of actions together
Modify and beautify the actions
Why
运用 D-C-M 方法写三个句子
Assignment
Thank you

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