资源简介

(共20张PPT)
2025年全国1卷读后续写
评讲
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Lead in
Conflict
Solution
核心表现：人物之间因各种原因产生分歧而后握手言和
关系冲突类续写
常见场景
人际交往冲突： 周测-少年因猜测误传同学谣言后澄清
亲子关系冲突： 2017年11月浙江卷-家庭旅行中，母亲的提议与孩子的安全感产生冲突。
2021年6月浙江卷-少年对自己辛苦赚取的工资要上交家庭感到不满。
2025年全国Ⅰ卷-两兄弟因聚会矛盾冷战
11月联考卷-父亲因此沉迷于球赛忽略儿子
My wife and I wanted to share our new home with family and friends by hosting a small gathering in the early summer. She had prepared lots of snacks, while my job was to have the backyard in order.
There was plenty of space for the kids to run and play. There was just one thing I hadn’t counted on: My brother chose to bring his dog Toby, a 50-pound ball of fire. Though friendly, he could easily knock over my niece’s small boys and my six-month-old granddaughter. So, when my brother showed up, I asked him to watch Toby and keep him outside.
My plan was working out just fine. Toby was using up his energy by running back and forth in the backyard and giving the kids plenty of room. Unexpectedly, after supper, the weather changed. It started to rain and everyone went indoors.
It was an awkward moment. I didn’t want Toby to be running around in the house, and my brother wasn’t happy with driving home with a wet dog. Eventually, my brother decided to leave rather than force the issue.
What
Clue
一.找人物及相应事件
happy
angry
A few days passed, and I hadn’t heard anything from my brother. I texted him and expressed wishes for him to come out again. His reply came as a surprise — a shock, actually: “Not a chance.” Clearly, he was unhappy over the way we had parted. After all, I had left him little choice. Well, he’ll get over it, I reasoned.
Two months passed. My wife suggested I get in touch with my brother, but I resisted, thinking he should call first. However, my conscience (良心) kept bothering me. I tried to put myself in my brother’s shoes. He was facing health issues and his wife of thirty-five years had passed away a few months earlier. Toby was his constant companion, the one who kept him going.
What
一.找人物及相应事件
Clue
struggling
guilty
原文无对话，但para2有“我”丰富的内心活动描写。
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四、根据首句线索，定框架（第一段框架）
Paragraph 1:
I realized it was me who was at fault.
Action:
具体错误是什么？——自私，忽视弟弟的感受，明白了狗对弟弟来说很重要
此时我的感受？
——内疚，羞愧（完成心理转变）
我的决定—道歉（转化为行动）
怎么道歉？
（衔接下文妻子的biscuits）
我受到鼓舞，前往弟弟家
P1误区：①未能具体展现出"我"意识到错误之后的反思与内疚What was the fault
②第一段没有心理转变铺垫，直接就写下定决心冲去道歉
③给妻子太多戏份
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四、根据首句线索，定框架（第二段框架）
Paragraph 2:
With the biscuits my wife had made, I arrived at my brother’s door.
Action:
我敲门，紧张。（动作+情绪描写）
我鼓起勇气道歉。（动作+情绪描写）
弟弟的反应-原谅我（动作+情绪描写）
弟弟开门，弟弟的反应（动作+情绪描写）
两人和解的画面
主题升华：珍惜家人在一起的时光，相互理解
P2误区：①未出现biscuits和Toby（原文的线索）
②道歉与和解过程描写一笔带过，过于生硬
邀请你语音通话...
“I”
二.找矛盾冲突点
conflict1-internal内在冲突:
conflict2-external:
心理转变
行为方式转变
the pride and guilt in my heart
麦克风已开
挂断
扬声器已关
Theme:主题升华：相互理解, 珍惜家人在一起的时光
外在冲突
the cold war between me and brother
②心理转变的触发点
三、对比同类文章找心理转变完成的标志
①心理转变完成的标志词？
struggling、regret、 guilt、 pain、shame...
How
When
心理转变
心理转变
心理转变
Seeing his hardworking figure, I was lost in thought. I’d only put in two weeks of work, but Dad, to support our family, had been working like this for years—day after day, without a break.（选自少年不愿上交工资篇）
“There’s a picture of a famous person on the back. I put the person together first, and then the map fit well by itself.” he replied, his voice filled with pride. Hearing this, I felt a sharp pain in my heart.（选自父亲沉迷球赛不愿陪儿子篇）
①Seeing.../At the sight of....
②Hearing...
③Thinking about....
心理转变的触发点
Thinking about the hard work of father, an inner voice told me that my growth and our whole family had been depending on my parents. Dad never complained about unfairness!（选自父亲沉迷球赛不愿陪儿子篇）
三、找心里转变的触发点
五、微技能1—人物心理转变过程
Hearing this, I felt a sharp pain in my heart. How could I be so selfish Bob had been trying to seek my attention, but I kept pushing him away with one excuse after another.
节选自11月联考-父亲沉迷于球赛而忽略儿子篇
I realized I was so selfish that I ingore my son’s for such a along time.
VS
①心理改变触发点
②当下情景的情绪描写（心理转变完成的标志）
③心理转变过程内心反思（善用自我反问与对比）
五、微技能1—人物心理转变过程
①心理转变的触发点：
②当下情景的情绪描写（心理转变完成的标志）
③内心反思/回忆（善用自我反问、对比、虚拟语气）
Seeing.../At the sight of..../Hearing.../Thinking about...
guilt / shame/pain/ regretful/lost in thought
I shouldn't have done...
How could I be so ...
Sb1 had been doing A but sb2 did B.
What if ....
An inner voice told me that...
Practice-情境描写（心理转变过程）
一想到他离开时失望的表情，我就感到内疚和羞愧。Toby长期以来一直给他安慰和温暖，我本不应该忽略他的感受。
At the thought of his disappointed expression when he left, I was seized by a sense of guilt and shame. Toby had been offering him comfort and warmth for a long time，I shouldn't have ignored his feeling.
参考词汇：At the thought of
be seized by a sense of...
had been doing(长期以来）

①心理改变触发点
②当下情景的情绪描写
（心理转变完成的标志）
③心理转变过程内心反思
（虚拟语气）
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行为转变
心理转变完成
动作链--动作面
Sb did A, did B and didC
六、微技能2—构建矛盾和解过程动作面
Done by A, Sb did B and did C, doing D.
Adj, Sb did B,did C, and did D.
微技能2—构建矛盾和解过程动作面
Determined to make up for the lost time, I turned off the TV, put down the beer, and knelt down beside him. “Let’s go, Bob. Let’s play catch now.”
节选自11月联考-父亲沉迷于球赛而忽略儿子篇
I apologized to my son and decided to play catch with him.
VS
Done/Doing A, Sb did B,did C, and didD.
微技能2—构建矛盾和解过程动作面
我松了一口气，鼓起勇气，拿出饼干说：“兄弟，对不起。我不应该拒绝Toby。他也是我的家人。”
Adj, Sb did B,did C, and did D.
行为转变
1、道歉
Relieved, I gathered courage, held out the biscuits and said, “Brother, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have rejected Toby. He is family, too.”
微技能2—构建矛盾和解过程动作面
Touched by my words, he approached and patted me on the shoulder gently, conveying his forgiveness.
他被我的话感动了，走近我，轻轻拍了拍我的肩膀，表示原谅。
2、原谅
Done by A, Sb did B and did C, doing D.
行为转变
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Check List
心理转变的触发点：
心理转变的过程 内心反思：
心理转变完成的标志
行为转变 矛盾和解过程动作面 （动作＋情绪＋对话） 前往哥哥家 道歉 原谅 和解（大团圆）
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范文赏析
I realized it was me who was at fault. I was so selfish that I totally ignored his feelings and his bond with Toby. To my brother, Toby was not only a pet dog but a loyal companion offering him comfort and warmth. At the thought of his disappointed expression when he left, I was seized by a sense of guilt and shame. So I decided/resolved to do something to make up for my thoughtlessness. Sensing my struggle, my wife offered to cook some biscuits as a gift for my brother. Encouraged by my wife, I strengthened my determination and headed for my brother's house.
范文赏析
With the biscuits my wife had made, I arrived at my brother’s door. As I knocked, my heart raced, because I was worried (that) he would resist meeting me. The instant the door was open, however, my brother invited me in. Relieved, I gathered courage, held out the biscuits and said, “Brother, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have rejected Toby. He is family, too.” Touched by my words, he approached and patted me on the shoulder gently, conveying his forgiveness. Beside us stood Toby merrily wagging his tail. As we were chatting, sweet memories of brotherhood flashed across my mind, it was at that moment that I realized we should cherish the time we spend together and think more from my brother's perspective. / As we were chatting, sweet memories of brotherhood flashed across my mind, reminding me to cherish the time we spend together and think more from my brother's perspective.
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