资源简介

(共16张PPT)
——以浙江卷读后续写为例
初识高中读后续写——
技能讲练：如何进行文本解读和情节构思
Learning Aims：
1. Learn to analyze plot line and emotional line by finding key verbs and adjectives.
2.Use the two given sentences and some strategies to outline possible plots.
3. Learn to use AFS to polish the language
4. Finish a 100 words continuation writing in class
阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。
①One weekend in July, Jane and her husband, Tom, had driven three hours to camp overnight by a lake in the forest. Unfortunately, on the way an unpleasant subject came up and they started to quarrel. By the time they reached the lake, Jane was so angry that she said to Tom, “I’m going to find a better spot for us to camp” and walked away.
②With no path to follow, Jane just walked on for quite a long time. After she had climbed to a high place, she turned around, hoping to see the lake. To her surprise, she saw nothing but forest and, far beyond, a snowcapped mountain top. She suddenly realized that she was lost.
③ “Tom!” she cried. “Help!” No reply. If only she had not left her mobile phone in that bag with Tom. Jane kept moving, but the farther she walked, the more confused she became. As night was beginning to fall, Jane was so tired that she had to stop for the night. Lying awake in the dark, Jane wanted very much to be with Tom and her family. She wanted to hold him and tell him how much she loved him.
④Jane rose at the break of day, hungry and thirsty. She could hear water trickling (滴落) somewhere at a distance. Quickly she followed the sound to a stream. To her great joy, she also saw some berry bushes. She drank and ate a few berries. Never in her life had she tasted anything better. Feeling stronger now, Jane began to walk along the stream and hope it would lead her to the lake.
⑤As she picked her way carefully along the stream, Jane heard a helicopter. Is that for me Unfortunately, the trees made it impossible for people to see her from above. A few minutes later, another helicopter flew overhead. Jane took off her yellow blouse, thinking that she should go to an open area and flag them if they came back again.
But no more helicopters came and it was dark. _________________________________
It was daybreak when Jane woke up. _________________________________________
Read
steps:
Think
Write
1) 5W
2) organization
3) plot
关键词
开头语
Predict the plot
1) Actions动作
2) Feelings情感
3) Surroundings环境
Get the main idea
3) language
Read for 5W
content who
when
where
what
Why
Jane was lost
they quarrelled
Jane, Tom
one weekend in July
in the forest
main idea
On weekend in July, Jane was lost in the forest because she had quarrelled with Tom.
One weekend in July, Jane and her husband, Tom, had driven three hours to camp overnight by a lake in the forest. Unfortunately, on the way an unpleasant subject came up and they started to quarrel. By the time they reached the lake, Jane was so angry that she said to Tom, “I’m going to find a better spot for us to camp” and walked away.
With no path to follow, Jane just walked on for quite a long time. After she had climbed to a high place, she turned around, hoping to see the lake. To her surprise, she saw nothing but forest and, far beyond, a snowcapped mountain top. She suddenly realized that she was lost.
“Tom!” she cried. “Help!”
No reply. If only she had not left her mobile phone in that bag with Tom. Jane kept moving, but the farther she walked, the more confused she became. As night was beginning to fall, Jane was so tired that she had to stop for the night. Lying awake in the dark, Jane wanted very much to be with Tom and her family. She wanted to hold him and tell him how much she loved him.
Jane rose at the break of day, hungry and thirsty. She could hear water trickling (滴落) somewhere at a distance. Quickly she followed the sound to a stream. To her great joy, she also saw some berry bushes. She drank and ate a few berries. Never in her life had she tasted anything better. Feeling stronger now, Jane began to walk along the stream and hope it would lead her to the lake.
As she picked her way carefully along the stream, Jane heard a helicopter. Is that for me Unfortunately, the trees made it impossible for people to see her from above. A few minutes later, another helicopter flew overhead. Jane took off her yellow blouse, thinking that she should go to an open area and flag them if they came back again.
But no more helicopters came and it was dark. _________________________________
It was daybreak when Jane woke up. _________________________________________
In what order is the material developed
One weekend in July, ……
As night was beginning to fall, ……
…… at the break of the day, ……
…… it was getting dark again.
It was daybreak when ……
Time
Read for the organization
Para.①
Para.③
Para.⑤
情
节
线
续1: But no more helicopters came and it was dark..…..
续2: It was daybreak when Jane woke up..…..
理清情节线,有助于情境的设定
kept moving,stopped for the night;missed Tom and her family.
heard a helicopter;didn’t see her;took off her yellow blouse;went to an open area
Para.②
Para.④
lost in the forest
drank and ate berries;walked along the stream
Read for Plot
明线
camp in the forest;quarrelled; walked away
Para.①
Para.②
Para.③
Para.④
Para.⑤
续1: ？
续2: ？
情感
线
理清情感变化,有助于构造合理合逻辑的情节
暗线
angry
surprise, lost
confused，tired，regret
hungry and thirsty,stronger
hopeful
One weekend in July, Jane and her husband, Tom, had driven three hours to camp overnight by a lake in the forest. Unfortunately, on the way an unpleasant subject came up and they started to quarrel. By the time they reached the lake, Jane was so angry that she said to Tom, “I’m going to find a better spot for us to camp” and walked away.
With no path to follow, Jane just walked on for quite a long time. After she had climbed to a high place, she turned around, hoping to see the lake. To her surprise, she saw nothing but forest and, far beyond, a snowcapped mountain top. She suddenly realized that she was lost.
“Tom!” she cried. “Help!”
No reply. If only she had not left her mobile phone in that bag with Tom. Jane kept moving, but the farther she walked, the more confused she became. As night was beginning to fall, Jane was so tired that she had to stop for the night. Lying awake in the dark, Jane wanted very much to be with Tom and her family. She wanted to hold him and tell him how much she loved him.
Jane rose at the break of day, hungry and thirsty. She could hear water trickling (滴落) somewhere at a distance. Quickly she followed the sound to a stream. To her great joy, she also saw some berry bushes. She drank and ate a few berries. Never in her life had she tasted anything better. Feeling stronger now, Jane began to walk along the stream and hope it would lead her to the lake.
As she picked her way carefully along the stream, Jane heard a helicopter. Is that for me Unfortunately, the trees made it impossible for people to see her from above. A few minutes later, another helicopter flew overhead. Jane took off her yellow blouse, thinking that she should go to an open area and flag them if they came back again.
But no more helicopters came and it was dark. _________________________________
It was daybreak when Jane woke up. _________________________________________
With no path to follow, Jane……（with复合结构）
……, she turned around, hoping to ……（非谓语动词）
Jane took off her yellow blouse, thinking that ……（非谓语动词）Jane rose……, hungry and thirsty. （形容词+形容词，作状语）
If only she had not left her mobile phone ……（虚拟语气）
Never in her life had she tasted anything better.（部分倒装）
Read for language
我们的情节构思
Para. 1 But no more helicopters came and it was getting dark again.
Para. 2 It was daybreak when Jane woke up.
How did Jane feel then？
What did Jane do then
How did Jane struggle through the night
Group work (3 minutes)
Was Jane rescued
Who rescued Jane
How was she rescued
How did she feel then
Individual work (3 minutes)
衔接一
衔接二
Think
discuss
Write表达的多样性
Jane's
feelings
Is that for me
“Tom!”
“Help!”
confused,
hungry and thirsty...
walked away, turned around, cried
actions
words
thoughts
looks
presentation
作品展示
字体字数 情节 语言 改进意见
自评/互评 标准 100字左右 字体工整 卷面整洁 两段字数大致相同 续写部分与所给短文及段落开头语衔接。 结尾符合正能量原则 情节构思与“思”环节一致 语言风格与原文一致 有使用高级句式 语法结构错误较少 词汇的丰富性和准确性 拼写和标点符号使用正确
【评】 Group-editing&Self-editing
But no more helicopter came and it was getting dark again. Exhausted and hopeless, Jane sat beside a tree, stretching her acing arms. “Had I not qualrrelled with Tom, I wouldn't have been here.” She was so regretful that tears welled up in her eyes. Since Jane already worn out, she quickly fell asleep beside the tree.
It was day break when Jane woke up. The sun shone through a break in the clouds. Jane walked along a stream, hoping to find the lake where Tom may camp at night. Suddenly, she heard a loud scream at a distance, “Jane, where are you ” To her great joy, it was Tom. They hugged tightly with each other, swearing that they will never leave each other again.
优秀作品赏析
surroundings
feelings
actions
thoughts
words
反思总结
1.如何确定两段框架
2.如何在框架下丰富文章内容, 确定主题
3.本节课我的收获 还有何疑问
Summary
THANKS

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