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(共26张PPT)
Constant
modification
makes
a
good
article
好文章是改出来的
高考评分标准：
第一档
覆盖了所有内容要点；
运用了多样的句式和丰富的词汇；
语法或用词方面有个别错误，但为尽可能表达丰富的内容所致；体现较强的语言运用能力；
有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，所写内容连贯、内容紧凑。完全达到了预期写作目的。
I.
Assessment
Criteria
Content
Language
Structure
A
good
composition
Beautiful
假设你是红星中学高三（1）班的学生李华。你班同学张强即将去国外读书，下面四幅图描述了同学们为他送行的过程，请根据图片的先后顺序用英语写一篇日记。
注意：1.
日记的开头已为你写好。
2.
词数不少于60。
This
afternoon,
II.Task
analysis---审文字
话题：
文体：
时态：
人称：
送行
叙事
(日记)
一般过去时
第一人称
第三人称
审图1
要点：上台讲话
细节：黑板上的“友谊地久天长”，同学流泪，气氛悲伤,表达不舍
1.Give
a
brief
speech
2.Moved
to
tears
3.
express
his
unwillingness
to
leave
4.
Long
Live
Friendship
审图
2
要点
gave
him
a
gift
细节：
a
heart-shaped
board
moments
flashed
into
our
mind
图3
signed
names
wrote
encouraging
words
express
wishes
要点：
took
a
photo
细节
:
record
the
precious
moment
smile
with
tears
held
the
flowers
审图4
give
a
brief
speech
gave
him
a
gift
signed
names
took
a
photo
moved
to
tears
express
his
unwillingness
to
leave
Long
Live
Friendship
a
heart-shaped
board
with
pictures
moments
flashed
into
our
mind
record
the
precious
moment
smile
with
tears
held
the
flowers
express
wishes
wrote
encouraging
words
Remember?
III.
Polishing
---Language(shining
point)
1）Long
distance
will
not
hinder
our
friendship.
I
really
hope
he
can
have
a
nice
future
abroad.
--田意歆
2）Having
received
the
gift,
Zhang
couldn’t
help
smiling.
---孔维伟
3）Tears
welled
up
in
her
eyes.
No
words
can
describe
that
touching
moment.
---周欣洋
4）We
stuck
the
pictures
on
a
board
which
bear
the
weight
of
our
memory.
---李星瑶
5）At
first,
Zhang
Qiang
gave
an
oration
to
express
how
unwilling
to
leave.
----杨博涵
6)
Next
came
the
thrilling
moment.
---孙玥
7）Sadness
filled
my
heart
.Tears
slipped
down
my
face.---高林翾
8）We
signed
our
names
on
his
T-shirt
to
convey
our
best
wishes
.
----朱一苇
9）To
Zhang
Qiang’s
surprise,
we
created
a
heart-shaped
board
which
decorated
with
cherished
photos.
----张显
10)
He
would
head
for
a
foreign
country
to
continue
his
study.
–吴宪晖
11）
We
took
a
photo
together
with
Zhang
Qiang
holding
the
flowers.–吴宪晖
hinder
Having
received
welled
up
which
bear
the
weight
of
our
memory
to
express
howunwilling
Next
came
slipped
down
to
convey
To
Zhang
Qiang’ssurprise
head
for
with
Zhang
Qiang
holding
the
flowers
III.
Language---
Practice
We
took
photos
together.
.
(定从）
The
photos
can
remind
him
of
the
happy
moments.
The
photos
that
we
took
together
can
remind
him
of
the
happy
moments.
After
we
heard
his
touching
speech,
we
sank
into
silence.
(分词）
Having
heard
his
touching
speech,
we
sank
into
silence.
3.
The
moment
was
recorded
by
the
camera.
The
moment
was
carved
into
our
hearts.
(not
only
,
but
also)
The
moment
was
not
only
recorded
by
the
camera
but
also
carved
into
our
hearts.
IV.
Polishing
--Content
Sample
1.
In
the
beginning,
Zhang
made
a
farewell
speech
in
which
he
expressed
his
love
for
our
class
and
the
sadness
for
departure.
Hearing
his
words,
we
were
moved
into
tears.
Sample2.
Tears
rolling
down
the
cheeks,
both
Zhang
and
the
class
were
filled
with
sorrow.
On
the
blackboard
wrote
“long
lives
our
friendship”.
Zhang
couldn’t
help
crying.
Sample
3.
First,
Qiang
made
a
speech.
At
that
moment,
all
the
eyes
were
on
him.
We
couldn’t
help
crying.
We
gave
him
a
bunch
of
flowers.
which
one
is
better?
Sample
1.
In
the
beginning,
Zhang
made
a
farewell
speech
in
which
he
expressed
his
love
for
our
class
and
the
sadness
for
departure.
Hearing
his
words,
we
were
moved
into
tears.
key
point(action)
–
details(reaction)
Sample
2.
Tears
rolling
down
the
cheeks,
both
Zhang
and
the
class
were
filled
with
sorrow.
On
the
blackboard
wrote
“long
lives
our
friendship”.
Zhang
couldn’t
help
crying.
NO
KEY
POINT
out
of
order
Sample
3.
First,
Qiang
made
a
speech.
At
that
moment,
all
the
eyes
were
on
him.
We
couldn’t
help
crying.
We
gave
him
a
bunch
of
flowers.
V.
Polishing
--Structure
Beginning
Ending
Linking
words
Beginning:
This
afternoon,
we
heard
Zhang
Qiang
would
go
abroad,
so
we
held
a
class
meeting
for
him.
日记的开头已为你写好
Transition
Group
work
Polish
the
essay
Show
Time
Polish
your
own
works
Homework
Thanks
for
your
attention!

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