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读后续写典例分析+范文欣赏（2）
读后续写深度解读:典例分析?
阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。
The spot of red was what first caught Randy?Heiss’sattention. He was hiking the remote expanse of land behind his ranch(大牧场) in Patagonia, Arizona, a town nearthe U.S.-Mexico border, and covered the grass was a?balloon—or at leastthe remains of one. Heiss walked toward it with his dog, Feliz, thinking heshould pick up the latex(乳胶)pieces and throw them away.
That’s when he noticed the balloon’s string was attached toa piece of paper.
“Dayami,” it read on one side, in a child’s writing.A hand-drawn bow accompanied the word.
Heiss turned the paper over quickly. It was a numbered list,all in Spanish. “My Spanish isn’t very good, but I could see it was a?Christmaslist,” he said.
Heiss was charmed. He thought that a child had tried to sendSanta Claus a Christmas wish list by balloon, something he used to do himselfwhen he was a kid. Nobody had ever returned the letters Heiss had sent into theair, but he wondered whether he couldn’t?find?the child who had sent this one.
It would be difficult, but Heiss knew about 20 miles to thesouthwest, just across the border, was the city of Nogales, Mexico, with apopulation of about a quarter million. “Based on the prevailing wind (盛行风), I was pretty sure that’s where itcame from,” he said.
Heiss brought the?note?home to his?wife, whois fluent in Spanish and helped him translate the list. They determined thatDayami, probably a girl, had asked for a doll, adollhouse, clothes, and art supplies among other things.
Heiss then posted about his request on the?Internet, attaching photos, hoping some of hisfriends in Nogales might know the girl’s?family.
A few days passed withno leads; Heiss worried that time was running out before Christmas. Therefore,he decided to send a private message to?Radio XENY, an AM radio stationbased in Nogales if they could help.
续写要求：
?? 1.?所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
?? 2.?至少使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语；
3.?续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；
4.?续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph?1:
To his surprise, someonefrom the station called him back right away.?????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Paragraph?2:
They bought just abouteverything on Dayami’s list.?????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????
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参考答案
【思路点拨】
1.?文本细解读，确定续写结局
本文是一篇记叙文，讲述了Heiss在徒步旅行途中发现了附在气球上的“圣诞礼物清单”，后来在懂西班牙语的妻子的帮助下，他们希望通过网络寻找这位用气球送愿望清单的女孩Dayami，并决定帮她实现梦想。但是在数天没有结果后，他们决定在圣诞节之前通过当地的无线广播寻找她。
续写部分应为故事的结局，即Heiss夫妇是否找到Dayami且帮助她实现圣诞梦想。根据文章内容可知，Heiss夫妇热情、富有爱心，明确了Dayami的所在之地且通过各种方式找寻Dayami，因此续写结局可设置为他们找到了Dayami一家并送了圣诞节礼物给她。
2.?段首句解读，确定续写方向
续写第一段首句写道“让他惊讶的是，很快就有人从电台给他打电话了”；第二段首句写道“他们买了Dayami的清单上的全部礼物”。由此可知第一段内容应着重描写他们得到了电台的帮助。他们通过电台扩散寻找Dayami的消息，最终找到了Dayami；这与第二段段首“他们买了Dayami的清单上的全部礼物”形成巧妙衔接。续写第二段内容应着重描写他们前往电台办公室见Dayami，以及一些简单的交流。
3.?划线词解读，规划续写细节
1）分类划线词
人物——Heiss,Dayami, wife
环境——RadioXENY, family
事物——ballon,Christmas list, note, Internet
动作——find
2）构思具体情节
???第一段具体情节：Heiss的妻子（wife）帮助他跟电台（RadioXENY）解释这一切→最终电台方同意帮助他们寻找（find）小女孩（Dayami）→第二天早上，电台就给他们回复说找到小女孩一家（family）了→Heiss希望能和小女孩一家见个面；
第二段具体情节：Heiss夫妇买了要送给Dayami的礼物→他们开车去了电台，终于见到了Dayami一家人→寒暄中了解到了挂着愿望清单的气球的故事。
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【范文欣赏】
Paragraph?1:
To his surprise, someonefrom the station called him back right away.?Heiss’s?wife?helpedexplain the situation to?Radio XENY?host, who talked on the air aboutthe quest to?find?Dayami?and posted it on the station’s website. Thenext morning, Heiss awoke to another message from Radio XENY: They had locatedDayami, an eight-year-old girl, and her?family, who indeed lived inNogales. Would they be willing to arrange a get-together at the radio station?
Paragraph?2:
They bought just abouteverything on Dayami’s list.They also bought a few other toys for good measure. Then the Heisses drove for45 minutes, crossing the border into Nogales. They arrived at the Radio XENYoffices with presents and finally met her. Her parents explained to the Heissesthat Dayami had been writing a letter containing her?Christmas list?toSanta and sending it by?balloon?for years, but this was the first timeanyone had found the?note. “It was a beautiful, beautiful experience,”Heiss said. He paused. “Quite healing for us,” he added.
亮点积累
1.?词汇
locatev.?找到；get-together?聚会；containv.?包含，包括
2.?短语
onthe air?在广播中；be willing to?愿意做某事；forgood measure?另外，附加
3.?提分句式
Herparents explained to the Heisses that Dayami had been writing a letter containingher Christmas list to Santa and sending it by balloon for years, but this wasthe first time anyone had found the note.
[分析]该句使用了explain to sb. that...的宾语从句结构，意为“对某人解释说某事”。宾语从句中，containing为现在分词，作letter的后置定语；but连接了两个分句，后一分句套用句型“it was the first time (that) sb. had done sth.”结构，意为“这是某人第一次做某事”。
[译文]她的爸妈向Heiss一家解释了这个奇妙的故事：Dayami近几年来每年都写一封包含她圣诞愿望清单的信并通过气球将它们送出去，但这是第一次有人发现了这封信
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读后续写深度解读:自主练习
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阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。
It was 11 p.m.The storm had moved directly over his?two-story?wood home in the ruraltown. Then he heard the smoke alarm beeping.?Lubeck?quickly walked downthe stairs barefoot to investigate; he opened the door to the basement, andflames exploded out.
Lubeck fled backupstairs to call 911 from his bedroom, but the?phone?didn’t work. Andwhen he tried to go down the exterior stairway, he was stopped by a wall offlames. “I started panicking,” he says.
Lubeck realizedhe was trapped. His?daughter?and young granddaughters, who lived withhim, were away for the night. His house was three miles off the main road andso well hidden by pines (松树) that Lubeckknew calling for help would be fruitless.
“I could hearthe fire moving through the house—boom, crash, bang, boom—and you know it’scoming for you,” Lubeck says. “The thing that got me was to die alone. Not tosay goodbye to someone.”
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Up a hill about a third of a mile away lived Lubeck’sclosest neighbors, Jeremie?Wentworth?and his wife. Wentworth had beenlying down listening to crickets chirping (蟋蟀鸣叫)when it occurred to him that the sound was more like a smoke detector. Hejumped out of bed, grabbed a phone and a?flashlight, and headed down thehillside toward the noise. That’s when he saw the roiling mountain of black?smoke.
He dialed (拨号) 911, then called out, “Is anyone there?” as heapproached the house. Wentworth knew that Lubeck lived in the house.
Then he heard,“Help me! I’m trapped!” coming from the balcony off Lubeck’s bedroom. On thephone, the 911 official warned Wentworth not to enter the?house. “Butthere was no way I was going to listen to Don scream and die in that?fire,”he says. “I told him, ‘I’m sorry, but I’m going in.’”
Inside thehouse, windows broke into pieces all around him. “I was yelling, ‘Don, whereare you?’ Then I had to run outside to catch my?breath.”
续写要求：
1.??????所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
2.??????至少使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语；
3.??????续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；
4.??????续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph1:
The wind partedthe black smoke just enough for him to glimpse Lubeck on the second-floorbalcony.????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????????????
Paragraph2:
Lubeck choked upwhen he told his daughter the story.????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
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参考答案
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【范文欣赏】
Paragraph1:
The wind partedthe black smoke just enough for him to glimpse Lubeck on the second-floorbalcony.?But there wasno way to get to him. “I shined the?flashlight?into the woods next to anold shed and noticed a ladder,” says?Wentworth. He dragged it over tothe balcony and pulled?Lubeck?down just as the second floor of the housecollapsed. As soon as the rescuers arrived, they sent Lubeck to the nearesthospital because he had difficulty breathing. They put out the?fire, butthe two-story house had been burned down. Upon hearing the news, the old’s?daughterhurried to the hospital.
Paragraph2:
Lubeck choked upwhen he told his daughter the story.?“I was alone,” he said. “Then I heard the most beautifulsound in my life. It was Jeremie.” Within the year, Lubeck and his family builta new?two-story?wood?house?at the site of the fire. Wentworth andLubeck don’t run into each other regularly, but Lubeck now knows that if heever needs help, Wentworth will be there.

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